Dear Kid,

Pi: Need help with dinner, Mom?
Me: Sure. You can be in charge of chopping
Puppy: Need help with dinner, Mom?
Me: Sure, you can be in charge of sniffing
Puppy: I was hoping to be in charge of tasting
Me: As it happens, I have an extra piece of carrot right here. Would you like to taste that?
Puppy: Yes! Yes! I’m sitting. I’m a good boy! That is a fantastic carrot! Thank you!
Pi: Oops! I “dropped” a piece of something on the floor
Puppy: I got it! I got it! Clean up on aisle Pi!
Me: You are very helpful
Puppy: I do my best

 

Pi: When is dinner?
Me: Soon
Puppy: When is dinner?
Me: You just had dinner
Puppy: I could have it again
Me: I’m sure you could. But you won’t
Puppy: You need to expand your thinking
Me: I’m trying to not expand your waistline

 

Puppy: Your dinner smells very good.
Me: Thank you. But please leave me alone. We’re having dinner
Puppy: I know. I’m trying to have some dinner too.
Me: You had your dinner. Now we’re having our dinner. Go play.
Puppy: I am playing. It’s a game called “Poke Mom’s Leg and Hope for a Taste of Dinner”
Me: Go play a different game

 

Puppy: I’m starving
Me: You just had dinner
Puppy: But you’re eating. So I’m starving
Me: Interesting logic. But no.
Puppy: No, I’m not starving? My nose says I’m starving
Me: You should explain to your nose that your tummy is full
Puppy: They don’t talk very often
Me: I know the feeling

Love, Mom

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