Dear Kid,

This is exactly how it happened…


Me: Would you like a treat?
Puppy: I would love a treat! I love treats! Treats are wonderful! That was delicious!
Me: Would you like another treat?
Puppy: I would love another treat! Treats are…why are you over by the sink with a treat?
Me: Come here, sweetie, and you can have the treat
Puppy: I Love treats! I…but why are you over by the sink? You are not thinking about a…a….a bath, are you?
Me: I have a treat right here for you
Puppy: You ARE thinking about a bath
Me: Come here, sweetie
Puppy: I don’t like baths
Me: Treat?
Puppy: But I do like treats


Me: Come on, come here, you can do it
Puppy: I’m coming over, but I’m not happy about it
Me: I know, baby, but here’s your treat
Puppy: Here’s what I think
Me: Yes?
Puppy: I think if I take the treat, you will think it’s ok to give me a bath. So if I don’t take the treat, no bath
Me: That is very interesting logic
Puppy: So no thank you to the treat
Me: You don’t have to have the treat. But you are getting a bath. Up you go
Puppy: What?! That didn’t work out right

Me: OK, all done
Puppy: I’m clean! I’m clean! I love being clean!
Me: If you love being clean, why do you fuss about having baths?
Puppy: It’s my job. And I’m NOT a water dog

Puppy: I’m clean! I’m clean! I must run around the house in excitement!
Me: You are clean and beautiful
Puppy: And now it’s time for cheese, right?
Me: Actually, we’re out of cheese so you get treats for behaving so nicely
Puppy: I can work with that – I love treats!
Me: I seem to have heard that rumor
Puppy: More treats!

Love, Mom

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