Dear Kid,

Me: Puppy?
Puppy: Sleeping
Me: Cleanup on Aisle 3
Puppy: What did you drop? I’m on it! I can handle it. I’m the dog for the job! I got this…it’s a crumb! I love crumbs. That is a delicious crumb.
Me: Thank you sweetie
Puppy: Are there more?
Me: Not right now
Puppy: I’ll wait, just in case

 

Me: Heel
Puppy: OK
Me: Stop pulling. Heel
Puppy: I said Ok…SQUIRREL!!! I’ll get it. Must. Go. Chase! This is important. Comeonecomeoncomeon!!
Me: Heel!
Puppy: Stop yanking. That’s not nice
Me: Heel.
Puppy: You have a lot to learn about squirrels

 

Me: Puppy, where are you?
Puppy: Sleeping
Me: You’re in the sun
Puppy: Sleeping
Me: It’s 93 degrees out here
Puppy: That’s why I’m sleeping
Me: Why not sleep in the shade?
Puppy: You just don’t get it

 

Puppy: Mom!
Me: Working
Puppy: I need attention
Me: In a bit—I’m working
Puppy: Now is good
Me: How about in a little while
Puppy: Is “now” so difficult to understand?
Me: Fine. I’ll sit on the floor next to you while I work. Is that better?
Puppy: Suit yourself. I’m going to go chew on a toy

 

Puppy: What do you have?
Me: A grilled cheese sandwich
Puppy: That. Smells. FanTAStic.
Me: Thank you, but it’s my grilled cheese sandwich
Puppy: You might share
Me: No, that’s not going to happen
Puppy: You might change your mind
Me: Seems highly unlikely
Puppy: I’ll wait. Just in case

Love, Mom

For more puppy conversations see Puppy Conversations and Food Observations, Spring Puppy Conversations, New Puppy Conversations, Winter WonderPuppy | Baby It’s Cold Outside, Puppy Conversations Translated for the College Kid, Puppy Conversations and FIFA World Cup Soccer, Puppy Conversations and the Joy of Quirkiness, Puppy Conversations| In the Beginning, Puppy Conversations | What’s In a Name?, Puppy Conversations | Puppy Plans a Party, and Puppy Speaks Foreign Languages…Sort Of