Rules for Life

Re-Reading and Re-Thinking

Dear Kid,

I love re-reading books. I particularly like stories that I haven’t read in a while, so even though I don’t really remember the plot, they are like well-worn slippers that I slide into, comfortable in the surety that they will still fit.

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Groucho DearKidLoveMom.comI’m a fan of fiction. I have more than enough reality IRL and I (generally) choose to read fiction that is light and fun and will in no way whatsoever change the course of the world.

Right now I’m rereading the Divergent series. I remember that when I read it the series the first time, I liked it progressively less as I worked my way through the books. But I often find that with a series (do you?) and didn’t think much about it.

This time I’m reading with a slightly different eye.

Actually, I don’t know that it’s my eye that has changed so much as our national landscape has changed. It’s a scarier book this time.

I can’t help thinking about which Faction I would be in, or that you and Pi and Dad would be in different ones. I can’t help thinking that we’re living in a world where hatred within our country is running so high that the idea of a war against People Not Like Us is not as ridiculous as it should be. Nor is the idea that leaders inevitably become tyrannical out of fear and a lust for power.

On a more frivolous note, in a self-sufficient post-massive-war Chicago, they still have coffee. And guns.

Not all the factions have soda or cake. But they couldn’t get rid of the coffee.

Or guns.

Maybe it’s not really a frivolous note….

Love, Mom

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Emails From My Fitbit

Dear Kid,

I’ve been getting a lot of emails from my Fitbit.

Fitbit: Your Charge HR battery level is low. Charge your battery as soon as possible. To charge: 

1. Plug the power cable into a USB port. 
2. Plug the other end of the power cable into the back of your Charge HR. A progress bar should appear on the screen. 
3. A full charge can take between 1-2 hours depending on the remaining battery level.

Thinking burns a lot of calories. For instance, how does the Fitbit tell the difference between sitting and watching bad reality TV (no effort) and sitting and contemplating bad reality TV (a great deal of effort)? Or gum chewing? How does the Fitbit account for the incredible number of calories I burn chomping on Trident? DearKidLoveMom.comFitbit: Your weekly progress report from Fitbit! Great job! You’re close to meeting your step goals! Just a little more and you’ll be there!

Fitbit: You spent 45 minutes on the Elliptical today! Congrats!

Fitbit: Your Charge HR battery level is low. Charge your battery as soon as possible. 

Fitbit: Your weekly progress report from Fitbit! You went to the gym four days this week. Fantastic!

Fitbit: You’re doing an excellent job sleeping. You’re hitting your goals!

Fitbit: Your weekly progress report from Fitbit! You walked a lot this week, but not as much as last week.

Fitbit: Seriously, Your Charge HR battery is really low. PLUG IT IN!

Fitbit: You’re starting to slack off a little. What’s going on?

Fitbit:  It’s great that you decided to go to the gym today! Next time you go, let’s do more than sit in the sauna!

Fitbit:  Sleeping is great, but it’s generally better if you work out at the gym.

Fitbit: PLUG. ME. IN!

Fitbit: I have no idea what you did yesterday, because you keep forgetting to charge me. But based on recent experience, I’m guessing I didn’t miss much…

Fitbit: Your weekly progress report from Fitbit! Are you really a slug or are you just too lazy to actually charge your Fitbit?

Fitbit: I know you like wearing me because I’m purple, but I can be much more than a fashion accessory. Let’s go walk somewhere!

Fitbit: Just so we’re clear, getting up from the couch to get ice cream is not considered a workout.

Fitbit: And no, typing is not an aerobic activity. Ever.

Love, Mom

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Flying in Pennsylvania

Dear Kid,

What is with the drivers in Pennsylvania?

When did they put an autobahn in the middle of Pennsylvania? DearKidLoveMom.comOn the drive east (clear weather), there were parts of the highway where the speed limit was 55 mph (I was driving 54.8 mph exactly) and cars were zooming past us so fast they were a mere blur. And we’re not talking about an occasional vehicle. Pretty much everyone on the road was doing a Speed Racer impersonation.

When did they put an autobahn in the middle of Pennsylvania?

I kept checking the road signs and the speedometer because I was convinced I had to have misread something. I hadn’t.

On the way back home (foggy and rainy) in that same stretch of Pennsylvania, cars were flying by (hard deck at about 2 feet above the road surface).

To the Pennsylvania Law Enforcement Officers: While I was driving below the speed limit (because I would never drive even a skootch over the legal limit), I know a few spots where you can make your monthly speeding ticket quota in an afternoon.

In all fairness, I’m not saying that the speeds of various vehicles was anything like consistent in other areas. But that particular stretch just seemed to be a real airport.

Love, Mom

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The Best Things About Fridays

Dear Kid,

Rise and shine!

The Best Things About Fridays DearKidLoveMom.comIt’s Friday and the morning is here. It’s time for coffee, breakfast, a ray or two of sunshine (woo hoo for the sunshine!).

Fridays are time to focus on finishing up with week on an up-note. For finding a surge of productivity.

Fridays are for putting the week in perspective and taking a deep breath. For breathing into the weekend and starting the new week refreshed and ready for whatever lies ahead.

Fridays are for friends, and family, and fun. For feasting and playing and resting and relaxing.

So let’s plunge into today headfirst. Grab the opportunity and the possibilities!

And the best thing about this Friday?

I get to see my kids!

Love, Mom

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It’s Time to Start Listening Again

Dear Kid,

There was a recent cartoon (one of the most reliable sources of news these days) that said “My Values = Good; Your Values = Stupid”.

My Values = Right Comic. DearKidLoveMom.com

It made me smile, not because it was particularly funny but because it was pretty much spot on for the times.

It seems it is becoming harder and harder to have reasonable, adult conversations about difficult or unfamiliar topics.

“I don’t have to share your beliefs to learn more and appreciate your point of view” has been replaced with “stupid.” “I don’t know enough yet to make an informed decision” has been replaced with “you are morally reprehensible”. And “Facts? I spit upon your facts!” now correlates to gunshots.

I can’t begin to tell you how troubled I am by all this. I don’t know how we move away from screaming and begin talking. I don’t know how we move away from rhetoric and begin listening, really listening, to each other. I’m not smart enough to even pretend to have the answer. However, I do know that when reasonable adults hold open, reasonable conversations full of honestly trying to understand and appreciate each other, good things happen.

Here’s to a day of listening.

Love, Mom

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Mah Jong

Dear Kid,

Mah Jong (Mandarin for Jewish women chatting and playing with tiles) DearKidLoveMom.comI learned (sort of) how to play Mah Jong (Mandarin for Jewish women chatting and playing with tiles). Turns out Mah Jong has nothing to do with the solitaire matching game one finds on computers and everything to do with complicated rules.

I did not master the hands. (Apparently, you’re not supposed to say things like “Oooh, I really like the dragons!”)

I did figure out the names of the tiles. None are named George.

My lesson did not include scoring (although I was told that people generally play for money).

Love, Mom

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