Dear Kid,

Last night was the Super Bowl.

As I predicted, many potato chips were consumed, many commercials were shown, and the Vince Lombardi Trophy went to Seahawks in a largely uncontested battle blowout.

RECAP

PreGame

Queen Latifah sang. A horse ran on the field. There were fireworks.

Renee Fleming sang (fab outfit) with a flyover. (In case you’re curious, it ran 1:53, easily under the 2:25 prop bet line.)

Denver had a lot more captains than Seattle making for very uneven handshakes. Joe Namath tried to mess things up by tossing the coin too early. I’m pretty sure his fur coat got to him. Seattle won the toss with tails (you should have listened to me).

First Quarter

The Seahawks kicked off and there was a big pile up of players short of the fifteen. Less than 15 seconds into the game, there is a SAFETY! I love safeties. Positively my favorite signal. (Makes the referees look like striped dreidels.)

After a bunch of plays, the 26 yard field goal attempt gets a penalty and becomes a 31 yard attempt which is no problem at all for Hauschka.

After a bunch of plays where it wasn’t clear anyone really wanted to play offense, Seattle settled for another field goal, proving that you can do it the hard way.

Best play so far: Hauschka’s kickoff hits the cross bar. Love it.

First quarter thoughts on commercials. Meh. But I did like the cow commercial and the Cheerios commercial. Ellen DeGeneres was ok, but more because she’s adorable than because I liked the commercial.

Second Quarter

The second quarter began with a couple of awesome commercials. There was a cancer survivor one by a car company, and a great GoDaddy one in which Gwen, the puppet maker, quit her job on national TV.

Seattle decided it might be nice to score in a more traditional way, so they scored a TD. PAT np. 15-0.

Did I mention that the Broncos hadn’t even managed a first down? Apparently someone clued Denver in about that so they decided to get one. And then a couple more. Which proved to be of interest to no one except the statisticians since Seattle intercepted the ball and ran it back for a TD. (And the announcers agree with Dad about why it happened was so there was peace in the world for a moment.) PAT no biggie. 22-0.

Love, love, love the Colbert commercial for pistachios. Best dressed eagle ever. And a great Muppet commercial for a car. So far, the animals and the puppets are winning the commercial wars.

Second quarter ends. I’m glad I’m not in the Denver locker room during half time.

Halftime happens.

The rain begins. Or it might be the Bronco fans crying.

A thought: the Broncos should have asked Bruno Mars to come in to give them some footwork lessons.

The commentators didn’t have much football to talk about so they gave a thorough analysis of the halftime show.

THE SECOND HALF

Third Quarter

The third quarter didn’t start any better for the Broncos. Harvin takes the kickoff all the way back for a TD. And the dude had hip surgery in August. I am in awe.

I admit, I really like the doberhuahua commercial. Dad likes the Tebow no contract commercials. Social media peeps think it’s cool that Tebow has taken the fact that he doesn’t have a contract and turned it into a big asset. Must agree. We also like the Axe Make Love Not War commercial.

Thinking about leaving early to beat the traffic. Oh, wait. We’re not actually at the game.

Nice Bruce Willis commercial about Hugs being better than blowing things up. Very nice Budweiser commercial about soldiers coming home. Don’t know what it has to do with beer, but nice commercial.

Seattle. Touchdown of the Amazing variety. 36-0.

Dumb commercial line of the night: Is there anything more American than America? Bob Dylan ought to be ashamed of himself. (“Auto” be ashamed?)

Is it me or is this a Very Long Third Quarter?

And with 2 seconds left in the quarter, the Broncos score. Yawn. 36-8

Fourth Quarter

Little dude from Seattle catches ball for TD. 43-8. I’m running out of fingers and toes.

Hauschka takes very interesting steps for a kickoff. Just thought I’d mention it. Don’t have that much else to talk about, y’know?

Love the Jaguar commercial with the British villains. Thumbs down for the Oikos commercial that is only barely saved from true tackiness by the arrival of the rest of the Full House gang.

Extra points if you recognized the music in the fourth quarter TMobile commercial.

It is not a close game when you can play the 12^th string in the Super Bowl. And the commentators sound bored. You get the feeling the Broncos just want this to be over.

Best Buds commercial for Budweiser with the puppy and Clydesdales—awesome.

The Gatorade was orange. And a double dunk in case you’re keeping track of these things.

SUMMARY

• Having extra captains doesn’t necessarily help.
• Having a great outfit for the National Anthem does.
• Malcolm Smith won the MVP award. Love that no one saw that coming.
• Denver must have thought all those Xs and Os were hugs and kisses rather than people to tackle. I’d blame it on the Axe Make Love Not War commercial except that didn’t air until the second half.
• There is no good time for a potty break during the Super Bowl. They should really run dead air for a few minutes somewhere in there.
• There was a lot of love and kindness in the commercials. Not sure what that means…

Love, Mom

The music in the TMobile commercial was from Disney’s Robin Hood. The animated one. Best Robin Hood Ever. Seriously. Ever.