Dear Kid,
We have a new project underway at house. Pi has decided (after much deliberation, calendar juggling, and mind changing) that she would like to have a Sweet Sixteen Party. The good news? She wants to have it at our house. The complication? She’s planning it.
Since (being a boy) you didn’t have a Sweet Sixteen (why is it that boys don’t have sweet sixteen parties? You were awfully sweet when you were 16 years old.) I thought it might be Important to Your Education to have some insight into how this happens.
Therefore, I have created a summary for you of the planning that has taken place over the last two days. I’m just that kind of a mom.
How to Plan a Sweet Sixteen Party in 16 Easy Steps
- Create a guest list
- Worry that there are too many people on the guest list
- Design and order invitations
- Plan enough food for 6 times the number of invited guests
- Add 403 different types of candy to the party planning list. Remind your mother that candy is mandatory because it is a SWEET 16
- Select complicated recipes for your mother to prepare because you only have the use of one arm
- Announce that you don’t like cake
- Decide that you need a 16 layer cake without cake in it
- Figure out the first three layers. Leave the rest for your mother to figure out
- Review the menu in stunning detail. Agree to remove one food item
- Plan decorations that will take a year to install and require another mortgage to pay for. Assume the elves will take care of it
- Worry that no one will attend because of other events that weekend
- Review the menu again. After arm wrestling (using the arm in the sling) with your mother, agree to remove one more food item from the list. Retaliate by mentioning that you have three recipes for macaroni and cheese which need to be taste tested before the party.
- Remind your mother you will need new shoes for the party. Appear shocked when your mother raises an eyebrow
- Create a detailed plan for tracking RSVPs. Assure you mother people will probably RSVP. Maybe
- Smile contentedly and begin texting
See how simple it is?
Stand by for changes and alterations.
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