Dear Kid,
The first thing to know about river otters is that they require rivers (unlike the Congressional Intelligence Committee which doesn’t require intelligence and only barely requires congressionals).
Also (rather like the Congressional Committee members) they are members of the weasel family and feed on whatever is available.
They need to eat frequently but (again, unlike CongressPeople) they have a high metabolism and rarely have martinis.
They (like CongressMembers) are mostly nocturnal and prefer play over work. They are highly communicative, using whistles, yelps, growls, screams, and grunts, but rarely say anything of value to regular humans. River otters (and possibly CongressHumans) use scent marking to secure their territory.
Because they are sneaky (or as they prefer “playful”) river otters can be trained to do exactly what they want to do (see: Congressional Representative). They can be successful bred in captivity but do not make good pets because very few people have rivers running through the center of their homes.
I will not be getting a river otter.
Or a pet congress person.
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