Dear Kid,

Do you remember I bought bee pollen a week or so ago at the farmer’s market? You might not because A) you were studying so diligently or B) that day’s post didn’t go out properly due to technical weirdness (so you can re-read it here). But I did.

Following the farmer’s instructions, I raced home (sort of) and put the pollen in the freezer as directed.

Then I promptly forgot about it.

Until I remembered and decided it was silly to invest in bee pollen if you’re not going to use it, and to use it you have to know how to use it and that required consulting My Friend the Internet.

I happened to have a few free minutes and so I did just that.

Here’s what I learned based on my extensive research of exactly one site.

Pollen is the male seed of the plant. This is factual and entirely less interesting than when the king in “Once Upon a Mattress” tries to explain the birds and the bees to his son (which I’m including here for your enjoyment because I’m that kind of mom).

Fact: Bee pollen can’t sting you. This is a good thing. But it gets, oh, so much better.

Bee pollen is approximately 40% protein and is one of nature’s most completely nourishing foods according to Bees Weekly interviews. Just kidding. The bees aren’t interviewed and they don’t have their own magazine, but bee pollen is all kinds of good for humans (and bees).

Bee pollen can’t be made in a laboratory. Something that looks like bee pollen and seems to be bee pollen can be made, but if you feed it to bees they die. So that is a big #fail.

It takes one bee working 8 hours a day for a solid month (no weekends off) to gather a teaspoon of pollen. Hence the price which doesn’t quite require a home loan but is still rather hefty.

The percentage of rejuvenating elements in bee pollen exceeds those present in brewer’s yeast and wheat germ.” Rejuvenating?? What??? Why didn’t anyone tell me about this sooner?

According to MFtI, bee pollen improves endurance and vitality, extends longevity, helps people recover from chronic illness and common illness (colds), builds new blood, and reduces cravings and addictions. It may also be the cure for the common election season, but that hasn’t been proven yet. It may protect against radiation and have anti-cancer qualities.

Local pollen can also help people who suffer from hay fever and allergies which is pretty much everyone in the Ohio River area (and by “Ohio River area” I mean USA).

What?? Why didn’t anyone tell me about this sooner? DearKidLoveMom.comBut here, is the second best part (the first best was the rejuvenation part because some of us are aging). Get this:

The British Sports Council recorded increases in strength of as high as 40 to 50 percent in those taking bee pollen regularly. Even more astounding, the British Royal Society has reported height increases in adults who take pollen.

Seriously.

I am absolutely going to start taking this stuff. Be on the lookout when you come home. I will be a 20 year-old who is a slim, buff, 5 foot 8 inches.

Love, Mom