Dear Kid,

Do you like your College Life?

Yes mom. I like my college life.

Do you like to crew a boat?
Do you like to feed a goat?

Yes, I like to crew a boat
but Mama, we don’t have a goat.*

Do you ride your bike to class?
Or do you sit upon your butt?

I ride my bike from here to there,
I ride my bike most everywhere.
I really like to crew a boat,
and when it’s cold, I wear my coat.

Do you get your homework done
or are you having too much fun?
Did you take a quiz today?
Did you pass it anyway?

Would you? Could you? read a book?
Would you? Could you? take a look?

Yes, Mom, I can read a book
and at my notes, I’ll take a look.
I did not have a quiz today,
but I’d have passed it anyway.
And I can study here or there,
Yes, I can study anywhere.

Is your laundry three weeks old?
Is your pizza getting cold?

My laundry isn’t three weeks old, my pizza rarely gets too cold,
I wear a coat to keep me warm,
I take umbrellas in a storm
I eat my breakfast and my lunch
My friends are nice, a real cool bunch.

I’m doing fine, I’m doing well,
And that is all there is to tell.

So please Mom, while I love this stuff
You have to know, enough’s enough.

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss!

Love, Mom

*Tune in tomorrow for an explanation of the the goat.

Dear Kid,

A friend of mine is trying to get in shape. This same friend is not known for eating vegetables (other than French fries) and believes that rinsing his mouth after brushing his teeth is sufficient water intake.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.
The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I have it on good authority that the importance of good nutrition has been pointed out to him. I also have it on good authority that the importance of drinking water has been explained to him. I further have it on good authority that only a drip of this has begun to sink in.

The official word is a person can live without food for more than a month (ha!), but can only live without water for (approximately) one week. It has not been proven how long a human can go without chocolate, but it seems that water is even more important to life than chocolate. But only just.

Pure water is the world’s first and foremost medicine. ~Slovakian Proverb

About two-thirds of the human body is water. Some parts of the body contain more water than others. 70% of your skin is water, 75% of your brain is water. Toenails are not particularly watery. So if you are looking to work out your toenails, you can go with minimal water consumption. For things like muscles and brains, drink up.

Most college students don’t drink enough water. They are busy drinking coffee and other caffeinated beverages that zap the brain awake short term but are actually de-hydrating and crash-inducing. Or they are drinking energy drinks which not only do not provide hydration, they can actually kill you, so they are a triple bad idea. Or they are drinking Adult Beverages which are also not hydrating.

By the time you feel thirsty, your body has lost over 1 percent of its total water amount. This may not seem very important, I know. But it is, so I’m bothering telling you so. (Extra points for getting the reference.) The most common cause of daytime fatigue is actually mild dehydration.

We never know the worth of water till the well is dry. ~Thomas Fuller, 1732

So there you are in class, in the gym, at a movie, whatever, and you feel the need to yawn. Or stop your workout. Or take a quick (or not so quick) nap. Culprit? Generally, lack of water.

It was wonderful having you home this weekend.

Feel free to share this letter as appropriate.

Love, Mom

“The news just came in from the County of Keck
That a very small bug by the name of Van Vleck
Is yawning so wide you can look down his neck.
This may not seem very important, I know, but it
Is, so I’m bothering telling you so.”
— Dr. Seuss’ Sleep Book