Dear Kid,
We are heading toward Thanksgiving. I’m guessing you’re already aware of that. I’m guessing every college student everywhere in the US knows that because you get time off.
According to My Friend the Internet (MFtI), the average American eats 4,500 calories on Thanksgiving. Yet we gain an average of 4 zillion pounds (follow the math here). There are two reasons we gain so much weight this time of year.
The first is that Thanksgiving isn’t Thanksgiving. I mean it’s not JUST Thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving is the Thanksgiving lunch at work, the drinks one evening, the meal preparation tasting, the trying out of the new recipes, the migrating from festive event to festive event, the post-Thanksgiving snacking, pumpkin muffins, and leftovers, leftovers, leftovers, and leftovers.
Thanksgiving is also about the 97 required servings of dessert at each of these events.
Which is why the invitation for our work Thanksgiving lunch specified that attire was (I kid you not) “jeans or fat pants”. I assume we got double points for wearing fat jeans.
Sometimes you just have to gobble down and enjoy.
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