Dear Kid,

In Cincinnati, we have trains. Not cute, adorable, Little Engine That Could trains. We have 200+ car,  intermodal, might-as-well-put-your-car-in-park-and-turn-it-off-because-we’re-going-to-be-here-a-while, rolling stock type trains.

40% of world’s freight cargo is transported via trains. At any given time 50% of that will be on the train that is causing me to be late for something.

I had the great pleasure of getting stopped by two different trains at two different crossings on my way to a client yesterday. Fortunately, I had plenty of time so it wasn’t a big deal. But it was boring. I think they should paint the containers so that people stuck watching the trains might have some entertainment. I wonder who I need to talk to about that.

The total area of contact between train wheels and the rail is little larger than one silver dollar. This is the moral equivalent to a hippopotamus wearing spiky high heels. A more entertaining but possibly less stable image.

Last night was the football banquet (and by “banquet” I mean pizza and salad) and awards night. Pi got her first Varsity Letter and a certificate for being a GMC Scholar Athlete. She’s pretty pleased about both. I handed out pizza and managed to thoroughly embarrass Pi by picking on one of her friends. All in all the evening was a great success.

Trains usually have four braking systems and one propulsion system. That is because it is much harder to stop a train than to get one moving. (The opposite of a tired teenager.) According to one source, if they could figure out how to use a train’s braking system to propel the train, there would be enough energy there to put the train into orbit. Personally, I’m amazed some 12-year-old hasn’t figured out how to do that, launched a company, and become ridiculously wealthy through the IPO.

Extra points if you remembered that my favorite train musical is Starlight Express (that’s the one on rollerskates). The score will now be running through my head all day. There are worse things.

The train says “choo-choo!” The mom says “I love you. Have a good day.”

Love, Mom