Dear Kid,
I’m exhausted. Fatigued, tired, beat, bushed, and out of synonyms.
You understand this because you napped for about 32 hours yesterday.
As I sit here (yawning), I started thinking about yawning.
As we know, the foremost authority on sleep and yawning is Dr. Seuss:
A yawn is quite catching,
you see. Like a cough.
It just takes one yawn
to start other yawns off.
The medical community doesn’t pay enough attention to Dr. Seuss.
They (the medical professionals of the world) agree that yawns are contagious (because duh), but they seem to think there are reasons beyond looking down someone’s neck. (And they have nothing to say about Biffer-Baum Birds.)
The medical dudes focus on (get this) science and biology. When you yawn, you stretch your jaw which increase blood flow in your neck and head, and sends spinal fluid and brain blood down. Meanwhile, incoming (cooler) air gets breathed in (maybe) cools the brain.
They (some medical professionals) tested this theory, hypothesizing that we (the test subjects) would yawn more when the air is cool and less when it’s hot.
Except (say the skeptics) the brain doesn’t need to be cooled down when it’s cool; the brain needs to be cooled down when it’s hot. Which makes the yawn-more-when-it’s-cool theory pretty much bass-ackwards.
Others in the medical profession say that the body cools down in other ways (sweating, drinking diet coke, cold showers) and a cooling process that doesn’t work when we most need it is ridiculous.
The “hey, it’s a social thing” camp says yawning is social communication. Maybe it says “you’re boring”, or maybe it says “yaaaawwww.”
Personally, I think it says, “Bed time.”
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