Posts Tagged "rules"

Rugby: Here’s What You Don’t Know About the Game

Dear Kid,

Guess what I did this past weekend? I went to a college rugby game.

I was (of course) there to see my favorite future athletic trainer work the game.

I particularly wanted to see something spectacularly colorful but ultimately insignificant happen so that I’d know the Kid was learning something. (This led to my friend saying, “Enjoy the rugby game. I hope someone gets hurt.”)

I don’t know why, but that reminds me of this:

It was snowing, windy, and about 28 degrees, so I was quite happy to find a parking space right near the end of the field from whence I could watch the game in relative comfort.

I may have witnessed the least injury-filled rugby game in the history of rugby.

No one understands rugby because it was (we think) invented in England where they have a history of creating sports no one understands (looking at you, Cricket). We know that rugby can be played with either 7 players on a side or 15 players on a side (although typically not at the same time) and that the traditional striped rugby shirt was very popular in the 70s. A game without mud is considered a failure and a game without injuries is considered unsporting. A game without alcohol immediately afterward is nonexistent.

Oh sure, there was mud. And yelling. And several dudes getting up from the bottoms of various piles looking a bit dazed. And Our Boys won, so yay.

Rugby shirts were really popular for a while in the '80s. Then we got over it. DearKidLoveMom.comBut there weren’t any interesting injuries. There weren’t even any uninteresting injuries. The highly developed medical assistance skills waiting on the side in of the field in the cold were not called upon.

Until about 5 minutes before the end of the game when one of the other team’s players went down with a splat and didn’t immediately bounce back up. (Fact: Rugby players may be big, but they are very Tigger-like in their bouncability.) After another moment or two, I thought “Oh good. I’ll see the Kid in action.”

Just as I thought that, the player got to his feet and lumbered off the field, and I thought, “Oh good. I’ll see the Kid in action on the sidelines.”

Do you know what an injured ruby player does? He does not head over to the athletic trainer’s table for assistance, oh no. He decides to walk it off. When that fails, he sits down. When that doesn’t help any more than the walking, he shrugs, gets up, takes his rugby shoes to the car, turns to his cell phone, and begins to take selfies.

When the athletic trainer (aka the Kid) brings him a Helpful Bag of Ice, do you know what he does? He takes the bag politely, thanks the Kid, places the ice bag on his injured knee (while standing) for 1.387 seconds, then stands there holding it (not anywhere near the injury) cheering on his team to defeat, all the while thinking that it will be much easier to deal with the pain (and the defeat) as soon as he’s drunk. (Probably also hoping that the team will finish quickly so he can begin that medical journey as soon as possible.)

Rugby. A game without mud is considered a failure. A game without injuries is considered unsporting. And a game without alcohol immediately afterward is nonexistent.

So that’s what I saw. The Kid delivering ice. But very well-qualified and well-bagged ice.

Note: Turns out there was also a pretty significant nosebleed that required nose plugs, but I didn’t know about that until much later.

Love, Mom

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March Madness is Coming

Dear Kid,

We’re coming up on March Madness season, and I speak not of St. Pat, but of the basketball craziness.

Doubtless, there will be craziness on the 17th, but we’ll deal with that another day.

So since MM is fast approaching, I thought I’d turn to My Friend the Internet and find some wonky rules to make fun of highlight.

Turns out that on the day when wacky rules were being handed out, college basketball stayed home. There just isn’t a basket-load (see how I did that?) of crazy, who-thought-that-would-be-a-good-idea regulations.

Other sports have plenty of crazy rules. Even chess has rules no one knows about (and even fewer understand). Cricket is a game made up entirely of crazy rules.Who knew basketball hoops grew on trees?

But apparently not so in bball.

Note: There are plenty of crazy (as in certifiable) NCAA rules, but they apply to all sports, not just basketball, so they don’t count. At least not in this respect.

Speaking of things I didn’t know, who knew that baskets grew on trees?

Enjoy the Madness of March—even without entertaining rules.

Love, Mom

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7 Things Every College Student Should Remember About Coming Home

Dear Kid,

Today is your last day of finals!

Congrats on making it through another year full of ups and downs and ups and downs and ups again.

7 Things Every College Student Should Remember About Coming Home DearKidLoveMom.comSince you’re coming home (yay), it’s time to review the Things Every College Student Should Remember About Coming Home.

You’re a member of our family (yay). You’re comfortable fixing your own breakfast, making lunch, and finding a snack when you’re hungry. You’re also capable of cleaning up after your breakfast, lunch, and snack.

Being a member of the family means taking turns doing chores like walking the Puppy and mowing the lawn. Both the Puppy and the lawn will be very, very happy to see you.

Since it’s Immediately After Exam Time, you’re entitled to a few days to sleep late and nap in the afternoon. This particular privilege does not last all summer.

5 Behaviors You Would Never Adopt But Just In Case You Were Considering Trying Them Out

  • Do not chew with your mouth open
  • Do not talk with your mouth full
  • Grunting is not an acceptable form of communication
  • Leaving all your gear and clothing on the kitchen floor is not an acceptable form of storage
  • Whining is best left to vintners

Love, Mom

Welcome Home!

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11 Commandments for Summer Vacation |Coming Home from College

Dear Kid,

Welcome Home! (Almost.) Your first year of college is over (Yark!), and it is time to haul all your accumulated stuff home for the summer.

Since you’re going to be home for an extended time (Yay!), I thought I’d best remind you of the Rules of Being Home. Or (if you prefer) the 11 Commandments for Summer Vacation.

Time to pack up and come home from college DearKidLoveMom.comPreamble

Thou shalt have 48 hours to sleep and be grumpy after which thou shalt return to being a member of the family and the human race.

As a Member of the Family and Human Race

  1. Thou shalt not whine.
  2. Thou shalt communicate (relatively) cheerfully.
  3. Thou shalt complete a minimum of one household chore per day.
    1. Eating is not considered a household chore.
    2. Neither is washing the dishes you used to make your own food.
  4. Thou shalt keep the floor of thy room free from dirty clothes, dirty dishes, and other hazards.
  5. Thou shalt inform thy mother and thy father of thy plans and when thou expecteth to return home.
  6. Thou shalt discuss thy grades, thy college plans, and thy career goals with thy parents. But not necessarily on thy first day home.
  7. Thou shalt not tease thy sister. At least not overmuch.
  8. Thou shalt wear sunscreen (at least outside).
  9. Thou shalt fetch more orange juice from the basement if thou finisheth the carton.
  10. Thou shalt not attach thy behind to the couch and thine eyes to the TV and assume thy day is complete.
  11. Thou shalt hug thy mother occasionally.

So excited to see you, sweetie.

Love, Mom


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Five Rules Every College Student MUST Know

Five Rules Every College Student Must Know DearKidLoveMom.comDear Kid,

A friend of mine who lives in Arizona called me the other night. Her son, the same age as you, was home for the college winter break and she was frustrated. Her formerly delightful child had changed some. Truth be told, she said, he was being rude and a royal pain in the patoot.

As we chatted, I realized no one had reviewed the Five Rules Every College Student Must Know with her son. A terrible oversight. I take full responsibility.

So without further ado, here are the

Five Rules Every College Student Must Know.

Children always need their parents and parents always need their children. Not always as in “every minute of every day” but always as in throughout our entire lives. As children grow up, the relationship changes, but it never disappears. At 2 months old, you needed someone to feed you and dress you and entertain you when sleep was not on your schedule (which was most of the time). At 12 years old, you needed to talk about friends and the Evils of Lunchroom Behavior. At 15 years old, we talked about driving, girls, food, and responsibility (and with Pi the impact of pink versus black nail polish). These days, we talk about college, responsibility, the future, jobs, girls, and food. Ok, some themes don’t change.

The point is no matter how old you get (personally, I intend to stop aging right about now), you will always be important to us. Hopefully, we will always be important to you.

We all have bad days. When I was a growing up, every now and then Grandpa would come home and say, “I am good and angry. It has nothing to do with you, but go easy.” Since we didn’t have no stupid children in our house, we went easy, he recovered from whatever had upset him, and life was good.

I knew I too occasionally used that type statement, but I didn’t realize how impactful it was (or perhaps how often I’d said it) until you came home from school one day and said, “I’m really angry. It has nothing to do with you, and I apologize in advance if I yell.” I was so proud of you for being able to identify that you were upset and still have the presence of mind to realize that just because people were in your general proximity didn’t mean they were responsible (and that you really didn’t intend to take it out on us).

We all have bad days. It’s not necessary to share the mood.

Rudeness–especially ongoing rudeness–is never OK. There is no call for rudeness, especially directed at your loving (and generally perfect) parents. There are no scientific studies (at least none that I’m aware of) showing the value of being a snot to your parents. There are no curricula (at least none that I’m aware of) for the first semester of college in which you are taught to be obnoxious to those who brought you into the world. There are no machines (at least none that I’m aware of) that somehow remove the phrases “please,” “thank you,” and “how can I help?” once you begin your college career.

This is your home, not a hotel. Hotels are great (as long as you can get a room). Other people clean the bathroom, other people make the beds and vacuum the floor, you can call room service and they’ll bring you all sorts of yummies. Of course, you’re generally confined to just one room (yours), the breakfast selection is limited (but if you’re a huge fan of bagels-from-a-bag and make your own waffles you might be set), and you have to pay astronomic amounts to spend the night with your head on a pillow that some stranger used the night before.

Home doesn’t come with all the servants (at least your home doesn’t), but it does come with food you can help yourself to, cars you can (sometimes) borrow, and rules. The rules, the chores, and the love are always here–no matter what. When you have your own home, you can make the rules (or not), eliminate the chores, and live however you like. And if you think that’s likely to happen, I will giggle until the cows come home because it’s amazing how one’s perspective on these things changes over time.

I’m sorry goes a long way. There are times when we are emotionally exhausted. When we’ve had to work really hard for a long time to hold it together. (For your sister, this was a daily occurrence when she was in pre-school.) Then we reach a safe spot and don’t feel the obligation to continue to have such a tight grip on ourselves, and we lose it.

Losing it looks different for different people. Some people yell, some people sulk, some people check out, some people become mass murderers. Some people aim for all at once. If you can recognize what’s going on in advance and warn the general public that you are a walking Mt. Vesuvius about to blow, that helps. If you can’t, and you end up spewing emotional lava all over your friends and family, don’t forget to apologize once the eruption is over. (Not right away, because you probably still have molten rock in your teeth. But as soon as you return to human status.) An apology makes a big difference.

To you, and my friend’s son who is now back in California getting ready for his second semester, I wish you a wonderful second half of your freshman year. You can do it, kid. You rock. (Not the molten kind.)

Love, Mom

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