Dear Kid,

In school we’re taught that time is a standard unit of measure. One minute is one minute whether it’s now or later.

The only reason for time is so that everything doesn’t happen at once. Albert Einstein

As with so much of what we learn in school, that is complete and utter hogwash.

How long a minute is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you’re on. Zall’s Second Law

Everyone knows that sometimes time races by so fast we barely blink and it’s next week. Sometimes it takes a week for the hands on the clock to move five minutes.

For disappearing acts, it’s hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work. Doug Larson

The problem (of course) is that we can’t control which time goes quickly and which goes slowly.

Time flies when you’re having fun.

For example, there seems to be a great deal of time from when I get up in the morning until when I leave for work. I have time to cuddle the Puppy, time for coffee (make that: very important time for coffee) and breakfast, time to read the newspaper, and still have plenty of time to get my act pulled together for work.

Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day. William Shakespeare

Then all of a sudden, I have 5 minutes left before I have to leave the house and time speeds up. Note to world: This is when it would be helpful for time to slow down.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

The last five minutes before I race out the door, generally feels like a movie played on fast forward. The problem is my body doesn’t usually move at double time. This same phenomenon occurs right before important meetings, right before leaving for vacation, and right before rushing to a sporting event.

Note to people who are about to comment on my time management skills: This is not a plea for help. This is a scientific observation.

My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time. Steve Jobs

Some professors have the gift of being able to slow time. I know you’ve been in lectures where you look at the clock to discover only 30 seconds have passed and you would have sworn it had been at least 90 minutes. I’m considering installing one of those lecturers in the kitchen so I can control those last five minutes a little better.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Welcome to DearKidLoveMom.com’s new home.

You didn’t notice? Good.

You can never go home again, but the truth is you can never leave home, so it’s all right. ~Maya Angelou

Yesterday, DearKidLoveMom moved to a new hosting service (we’d outgrown our starter hostess—shout out and thank you to the fab Donna who did all the packing and moving).

Home is not where you live but where they understand you. ~Christian Morgenstern

I’m not sure that people with a subscription got yesterday’s post (it was about America’s Got Talent and you can find it here). If you didn’t get it, I’m sorry. It was probably in a box that didn’t get unpacked as quickly as it should have.

Hopefully today’s post behaves the way it’s supposed to and reaches you as it’s supposed to.

Home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke, or spirit ever answered to, in the strongest conjuration. ~Charles Dickens

“Home” is one of those interesting words. You can’t really translate the concept into most languages. It’s more than “house”, it’s more than “castle”, it’s more than a type of structure.

Home means different things to different people, and I think it means different things depending on the stage of your life.

Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to. ~John Ed Pearce

I hope that you can make a home wherever your wanderings take you, but that you’ll always come home to us (at least to visit).

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

You’ve probably heard that you have two ears and one mouth because you’re supposed to spend twice as much time listening as you do talking.

Even if it’s been around for a while, it’s excellent advice.

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway

There are times when it’s entirely appropriate to allow any thoughts that wander into your head to spill out of your mouth without running through any brain-based reasoning. For example, talking to the Puppy is a fine time for unfiltered thought. Talking to people, however, generally requires a little more restraint.

Not everything you think is suitable for public conversation. You already know not to go out of your way to insult people or to give your “honest” opinion when tact might be a better option. But there are times for even more restraint.

Sometimes, we think we’re entertaining someone with a story, anecdote, or parable that will improve their life or at least amuse them. You’re not doing anything harmful and the listener will get to find out how well spoken and erudite you are. Genius!

Except the “listener” is actually composing a shopping list for the party they are hosting in a few days.

Not so impressive.

Asking a question and then really listening to the answer is generally a much straighter path to showing how smart you are. After all, you’re smart enough to listen to the person talking.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Somebody said yesterday that I am given to exaggeration. I prefer to think that I give exaggeration to the world.

Puppy: What does that mean?
Me: It means it means that when I said that dinner was the best meal I’ve ever eaten, it was really only the second best.
Puppy: So when you say I’m the best puppy in the world, I’m only second best?
Me: Of course you’re the best—I never exaggerate about you.

Some are born to exaggerate; some have exaggeration blogged upon them.

As I started thinking about exaggeration, I realized that there were zillions of words crashing around in brain, making it hard to even begin to consider concentrating.

Puppy: What does that mean?
Me: That I have a lot of words fighting for priority order in my brain
Puppy: Don’t you usually?
Me: Are you interested in being fed today?
Puppy: Napping. Saying nothing

That sounds like an excellent idea. I believe I shall take a 17 hour nap.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

College life is not always easy. There are days that seem to sail along with everything in place. And there are days that feel designed to make your world as difficult as possible.

Not to rain on your parade, but real life is like that too.

If you’re going through hell, keep going. ~Winston Churchill

The good news is that that when you’re in the midst of a string of days that feel like glass-entirely-empty-days-when-you’ve-just-come-back-from-a-10-mile-run, glass-overflowing-with-good-stuff days will show up. No promises on how quickly, but they will happen.

The trick is to keep going and not let dehydration take over.

A bend in the road is not the end of the road… unless you fail to make the turn. ~Author Unknown

For years, college students have been coming to the end of a semester, encountering ridiculous amounts of work, less than ideal professors, incomprehensible assignments, and somehow making it through. You don’t have to go it alone, Kid. There are people who’ve been down this road and know where the turns are.

There are also people who know how to teach, tutor, and organize on campus. If your instructor(s) isn’t one of them, go find someone who is.

Mom Advice: Take a deep breath, be sure to eat lunch, and get through one step at a time.

Love ya’ Kiddo!

Love, Mom