Dear Kid,

In honor of graduation (yep, it’s today), we search Pinterest (and by “we” I mean Pi) for inspiring graduation ideas.

She decided we would make chocolate Reese’s mortar boards.

So Grandma and Grandpa peeled wrappers from about a million mini Reese’s cups, and you and I set up our assembly shop to manufacture create put together said hats. To be fair, Pi made the first one to show us how (followed immediately by Pi eating the first one).

In other news, the sheer volume of sugar in our house right now could send an entire country (a small one, but still) into diabetic shock.

Congrats (or Congrads) to all the graduates.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

We are nearing the Super Bowl (you probably heard about that). And when I think Super Bowl, I think Super Bowl party. And when I think Super Bowl party, I think food.

And when I think college kid I think food.

And when I think college kid and the Super Bowl, I think food.

When I think college kid, dorm room, and extensive chopping and food preparation, I end up rolling on the floor laughing.

There are 4 zillion websites devoted to intricate dips, snacks, and fun food for The Big Game. None of them are designed for a dorm room.

So being the kind of mother I am, I have ever so thoughtfully provided this Guide to Super Bowl Snacks in Your Dorm Room.

Ingredients: A small bit of planning. Bowls optional. No knives or chopping necessary.

Crudité. Seriously? Probably not. If you want something green, check a roommate’s sneakers.

Guacamole. Buy guacamole. Open. Eat.

Salsa. Very similar to guac except you buy salsa.

Chips. Open bag. Improvise.

Snack mix. Go crazy. Open a bag of Chex mix and add peanuts or potato chips. Gourmet!

Need main course options? Not a problem. Pizza, burgers, a splurge on Chipotle, or even hop over to the cafeteria before the game begins.

Decorations. Consider semi-inflated balloons. (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

Get your homework done before kickoff.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Happy February!

Not only is tomorrow Groundhog Day (I love a holiday that celebrates furry critters), it is also the second most indulgent Day of Eating As Much As You Can in the US (the first being Thanksgiving). It is Superbowl Sunday.

Some of us will be watching the Big Game from the comfort of our own home, in PJs, wrapped in comfy blankets. Some of us will be gathered in dorm rooms, passing around big bags of chips. Some of us will be attending (various degrees of) lavish football-themed parties.

Wherever we are, some of us will be screaming at the TV, some of us will be waiting for the commercials, some of us will be focusing on the food. You know who you are.

Having attended four professional-ish events in the last week (yep, it’s been busy), I have a few things to say about parties.

1. If you are going to serve hot hors d’oeuvres it’s a good idea if they are (what’s the word I’m looking for? Oh, yeah) hot.
2. If you are going to serve crab cakes, it’s kind of cool if there is actual crab included.
3. If you are a server, there is no need to be sullen. Especially if you are the coffee refill person at an event that begins at 7:30am in a venue that is–for lack of a better work–freezing.
4. If someone asks for decaf, do not tell them that the high-octane coffee is decaf. They may come kill you when they’re still awake at 4am.
5. If you have a drawing for a door prize, it’s better if you pick me.
6. If you are going to throw a shin-dig in the ‘Nati in winter, you need a place for coats.
7. If you are hosting an event at which people will be standing around talking, holding drinks, and eating (simultaneously at the same time) do not serve something that requires knives. Especially if you don’t plan to provide knives.
8. If you’re not sure everyone at your party will be rooting for the same team, hide the knives.
9. If you’re planning to serve food that spills easily, it might be a good idea to have a hungry dog handy to help with clean-up after especially exciting plays.
10. Super Bowl Parties need not be over-the-top affairs. Warm up a pizza (if you try having it delivered during game time, you’re probably out of luck), open a bag of chips, and don’t forget to have fun at your own party.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

As I believe I have mentioned once or twice, it’s all a matter of perspective.

For example, some people (you) might think it is fun to go out in the freezing cold and kick a ball through the uprights while many (11) large, muscular, bulked up type people try to prevent said kick. Some people (you) might think it is fun to stand on ice, balanced on razor thin blades, waiting to prevent a puck moving at light speed from getting into a net. Other people (me) might be happy to watch those things (especially if you are involved), but under no circumstances whatsoever would even consider participating.

Some people (me) might think shoe shopping is one of Life’s Pleasures while other people (you) might think shoe shopping is ok if you’re getting a new pair of sneakers but honestly how many high heels can one mom try on? (answer: a lot).

I think, however, that I have found the Ultimate Example of this type of perspective.

Last night I went to a CAbi party. I had never attended one before—allow me to set the scene. Some hors d’oeuvres, some adult beverages, a dozen or so old middle age my age women (many of whom had never met before), and a boat load of clothes. Which were modeled by some of the attendees (the tall, skinny attendees) and discussed by Tammy, while we (all the attendees) studiously marked down the items we were interested in. After the modeling and the demonstrations, we got to try on the clothes.

It was awesome. Women of all shapes and sizes, laughing, throwing clothes everywhere, prancing around in our skivvies, trying on outfits to Figure Out the Right Size. (To be fair, no one really pranced.) I’d say a college age boy would probably not think that was a Grand Old Time, but I had lots of fun. I even bought a top (which will be delivered eventually and about which you will be kind enough to say something like “awesome top, mom”).

But as we were prancing (or not) it occurred to me that this was probably one of those moments aliens (and college boys, because in this case it’s close to the same thing) would never in a zillion years “get.” In fact, I would bet that many a college boy, walking in on such a scene, would mutter something about having to burn his eyes out (after grabbing some food and beverage) and hightail it for the nearest mancave and football game.

It’s all a matter of perspective.

Love, Mom

Haven’t “Liked” DearKidLoveMom on Facebook? There’s no time like the present! (Which sounds like a good title for a blog….)

Dear Kid,

It has been quite an eventful and event-full weekend. Not only did we have graduation (SO proud of you), three soccer games, the football combine, and countless graduation parties that other people hosted, we had two graduation parties that we hosted/co-hosted.

Here’s what I have learned about graduation parties.

• They involve a significant number of graduates. Which reminded me that this may be one of the last times I get to see this particular group of your friends congregated in one place. (sniff)
• It is not possible to diet during graduation season. Graduation involves a LOT of food. And a lot of cake. Fortunately, the wonderful Debba has agreed to do an extra spin class on my behalf.
• Green frosting stains. I discovered this when someone else got frosting on their clothing. My Ohio University shirt remains pristine.
• Party-hopping is not only accepted, it is expected. Since everyone is having their graduation party during the same general time-frame, going from location to location is the only way to get to see everyone.  And to try all the different varieties of food. It’s like an advanced scavenger hunt.
• Graduation parties mean graduation party leftovers. Hope you liked what we served—we’re going to be enjoying it for a while.

You are friends with very nice people, kid. And you are a very good host.

Hope you had a good time too.

Love, Mom