Posts Tagged "hawk"

Reading Improves the Mind and Potato Chips

Dear Kid,

I was just going to read one chapter before I went to sleep. Six chapters later, I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore. I should know better. There are some things that just should never be said. Or even thought.

Things like “I will just read one chapter.”

Things like “I will eat just one potato chip.”

There is no such thing as eating one potato chip. There is eating no potato chips; there is eating an entire 5 pound bag of chips. Science has not discovered anything in between. The thought of having one potato chip and not eating any more is beyond revolutionary, it’s utterly ridiculous.

There have been rare sightings of someone reading just one chapter. They are usually on a college campus and the books in question are usually Assigned Reading for a class outside of the student’s area of interest. It pretty much never happens when the book in question is a Robert B. Parker novel. Even a novel you’ve read 16 or 17 times previously.

Even if you promise yourself, PROMISE, that you will treat yourself to just one chapter, just one little chapter, because you deserve a little treat before going to sleep, and you know you’re exhausted which is why one small chapter won’t be problem, and then it will be lights out.

But it was such a short chapter. Just a few more minutes won’t hurt. Not a big deal at all. Reading is good for the mind. It’s relaxing. This is brain candy. It’s soothing and creative all at the same time.

If anything, that was an even shorter chapter, and how can one possibly go to sleep when Spenser (our hero) might get shot in the Very Next Chapter? Probably best just to read a bit more to be sure he doesn’t get injured even though that would really ruin the book so you know Parker isn’t going to do that but better safe than sorry.

And there you are, six chapters later, fighting to keep your eyes open and your rationale going and you just have to get some sleep.

Just don’t put your head down on the book because you will get potato chip crumbs crushed into your cheek.

Love, Mom

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Have You Heard About This Thing?

Dear Kid,

Have you heard about the IO Hawk?

Just imagine a Segway and a skateboard had a baby. Don’t spend a lot of time thinking about the mechanics involved; just assume the whole thing happened in a laboratory (since that probably is where it happened) or like a baby in a Disney movie (quick shot of the prince and princess getting married; cut to One Year Later with a beautiful baby and the Happy Couple looking well rested and not having gained an ounce. Disney babies. Not real life.).

The IO Hawk is a Segway without handle bars. You can’t go very fast (top speed 6 miles per hour) or very far (about 10 miles on a three hour charge), but you will look très super cool tooling around on this thing.

Here is a link to the VBV (Very Boring Video) which shows what this thing actually is. Don’t bother turning on your sound—it’s just background music.

So if you happen to have an extra $1,800 (plus tax and shipping) sitting around (just so we’re clear: you don’t) you can own an IO Hawk.

Now you know.

Love, Mom

P.S. Sorry for the late posting. It’s been That Sort of a Weekend…

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