Posts Tagged "Happy Birthday"

Uncle Sean’s Birthday, the Card, and the Kitchen Table

Dear Kid,

It’s going to get blamed on me. It’s not exactly my fault, but people often overlook the kitchen table as a Viable Culprit. I am definitely going to get blamed.

Happy Birthday! DearKidLoveMom.comToday is Uncle Sean’s birthday.

I bought a card about two weeks ago. It’s a great card in general. It is a particularly great card for Uncle Sean.

I made sure to have Pi sign it last weekend before she left for one of her various activities. I left it for you and Dad to sign. I’m pretty sure it was at that point that the kitchen table stepped in.

We have a nice kitchen table. It’s generally pretty understanding about having various condiments and beverages spilled on it. It’s accommodating when someone dumps a knapsack on it. It doesn’t generally shove a large pile of papers onto the floor when someone leaves them too near the edge. Every now and then it will reach out and bite someone on the ankle, but for the most part it is very well behaved.

Up until now.

Maybe the scale was a bad influence; I’m not sure.

The table took the card and slid it into a time warp. Not a big time warp mind you, just a handy, card-sized pocket of a time warp. Then it sat quietly and watched.

The thing about time warps is that you don’t notice them. When you look at them, your eyes slide right around to the other side without noticing that you’re overlooking the important part. Like magicians, only moreso.

For the last week, I’ve overlooked the card—not on purpose, but because of the time warp and the kitchen table. It’s not until I’m about to fall asleep or at work (it can be hard to tell the two apart) that I think “Uncle Sean’s birthday is coming up. I MUST get that card in the mail tomorrwwwww…zzzzz….”

Google put an end to the problem when it popped up a calendar reminder this morning.

It is well-known that Google (with or without the Alphabet) is stronger than most (but not all) of the kitchen tables in the world.

As I marched downstairs this morning, I therefore muttered in my sternest voice, “Now would be an excellent time to put that card right back where you found it.”

Kitchen tables have excellent hearing. There’s no need to yell if you know what you’re doing.

Lo and behold, there was the card happily waiting to be sealed in an envelope and sent eastward.

The kitchen table didn’t even have the decency to look embarrassed.

Which left only one problem.

The USPS can’t pick up here and deliver there on the same day.

Which means Uncle Sean’s birthday card will be late.

Happy birthday Uncle Sean! From all of us (except the kitchen table who is currently in a time out).

Love, Mom


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Bet You Never Got This for Your Birthday

Dear Kid,

Yesterday was a great day.

I got a great balloon…

Happy Birthday Balloon.

…complete with a zero calorie cupcake.

Zero Calorie Cupcake.

I got a fruit basket (awesome!), I was taken to lunch, and I went shopping with Pi. For her.

After Dad took Booker for his bedtime walk, he yelled to me “Don’t move, don’t move, I’ve got one more present for you. Wait right there, I’ve got one more present!”

Here is my “one more present.” After the photo, my “one more present” was returned to not-in-the-house!Birthday Toad.

Thanks for calling yesterday.

Love you baby,

Love, Mom

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Puppy Conversations | April 15 and Puppy Takes Over the Blog

Dear Kid,

As we have previously established (April 15: The Good, The Truth, And How to Survive It), April 15th is not a notoriously fabulous day.

It should be a fantabulous day, and in some respects it is, but overall, April 15 has a bad rap.

Puppy: Move over
Me: Excuse me?
Puppy: It’s called A Present. I am Present to write today’s blog.
Me: Do you know how to type?
Puppy: Good point. I’ll tell you and you type.
Me: We can try
Puppy: Dear Kid (that’s how you start, right?)
Me: Works for me
Puppy: April 15th is a great day. I pooped.
Me: Seriously? You want me to write that?
Puppy: TYPE!
Me: Typing
Puppy: I have a busy day planned. It is called Breakfast, Dinner, and Napping.
Me: You live one crazy life, buddy
Puppy: Maybe today Mom will give me the new present she bought for me
Me: Stop looking at me like that. And today is not the day
Puppy: It’s not doing anyone any good sitting on the counter
Me: Besides, how did you know about it?
Puppy: I am The Puppy. I know everything
Me: Uh-huh
Puppy: Napping is very important. There are many different kinds of napping. There is curled-up napping, napping with your nose under a blanket, napping with your legs straight out. Some dogs even like napping on their backs, but that seems ridiculous to me.
Me: Good thing you’re not judgmental
Puppy: I’m a dog. I love everyone. There is napping on my pillow, napping on the porch, napping on my blanket, and napping wherever the pack is.
Me: Very busy.
Puppy: Very. And I have new food. Dad thinks I didn’t notice, but of course I noticed. But it’s food, so I don’t complain.
Me: Generous of you
Puppy: Mom says it’s called “senior food” which means I can go to college when I finish it
Me: Not sure you got that interpretation quite right
Puppy: Happy April 15th. Love, Booker
Me: Got it
Puppy: You typed that very well. I have to go nap now.

Happy April 15th.

Love, Mom

See more puppy conversations

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How You Feel About Mondays Says a Lot About How You Feel About Life

Dear Kid,

Once again we have rounded the weekly corner and it is Monday.

For some people, Mondays are to be dreaded as they involve going back to school or work and returning to the weekday routine.

How you feel about Mondays says a lot about how you feel about your life. DearKidLoveMom.comFor other people, Mondays are to be celebrated as they involve going back to school or work and returning to the weekday routine.

And for still others, Mondays are simply Mondays.

For the Puppy, Mondays are exciting because every day is exciting. One of the great things about dogs is they have a very low bar for excitement. Morning! Fantastic. Air molecules! How wonderful!

How you feel about Mondays has a great deal to do with how you feel about your life in general. When you’re in a good place, Mondays may not be the Best of All Possible Things, but they are generally not hideous. When you’re life is not all it needs to be, Mondays can be pretty bad.

If you’re happy today is Monday, YAY! Happy Monday, and may you have a wonderful week.

If you’re not happy to find yourself facing another Monday, take a look at your life and think about what you might be able to change to make Mondays more bearable. After all, Mondays constitute 1/7 of your life. That’s a lot of time to dread.

Happy Birthday! DearKidLoveMom.comAnd if you should be lucky enough for this particular Monday to be your birthday, then you are a very lucky bunny indeed. And I hope it is an exceptionally wonderful birthday.

Love, Mom

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Birthday Wishes!

Dear Kid,

Just in case you haven’t checked the calendar, today is March 8th. It’s also Change the Clocks Day, which seems like a royal rip off because it means you get an hour less to celebrate your birthday.

On the other hand, since we’ve been celebrating for several days, I’m willing to bet you’ve gotten a fairly good dose of Happily Celebration.

So for you (and anyone else celebrating today) and for our Happy Birthday Bunny (and anyone else) celebrating tomorrowBirthday Cake, Happy Birthday Kid

Happy Birthday, Kiddo!

Love, Mom

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