Dear Kid,

There is more to color than meets the eye.

Partly that’s because (according to scientists) color doesn’t exist—the concept of colors is all in our fabulous brains. Never mind that we all see the same thing—it isn’t there. Whatever.

Turns out that (nonexistent) colors have a huge impact on us.

We all know that walking into a room with color we like makes us feel better. We also know that most moms will not paint their teenager’s room black. This conflict may be the source of all teenage angst.

Red is an interesting color. It tends to make people eat more (so do yellow and orange) which makes it a fabulous color for restaurants hoping to get us to order dessert. It was trés trendy to paint dining rooms red for a while. Red is not the official color of Weight Watchers.

Red can also increase muscle reaction time, raise your blood pressure, and make you want to gamble more. Guess what the predominant color in most casinos is?

You can celebrate a red-letter day, see red when you’re angry, or red-shirt a freshman. You can be distracted by a red-herring, take a red-eye flight across the country, or find your business in the red (none of which are great things).

Yellow is a harsh color (I did not make that up) and should never be used in a baby’s room because studies have shown babies cry more in yellow rooms. Yellow can also make people nauseous which is why designers don’t use yellow on airplanes.

Green can increase concentration. I’d suggest you go study on a nice lawn somewhere but the distractions probably outweigh the green. Which it is not easy to be.

Pink is (officially) a soothing color and is therefore used on walls in mental facilities and prisons (except where they use a horrid shade of green). Some sports teams paint the visitors’ locker room pink in the hopes that it will dissipate some of their energy and enthusiasm. Pink is also the color Pepto Bismol which some people find soothing to their tummies.

Purple is the color of royalty and 7^th grade girls.

Blue conveys trust, reliability, and loyalty (which is why people wear blue suits to a job interview—think “true blue”). Studies have shown that blue is calm and peaceful and can help people be more productive. Weightlifters are able to handle heavier weights in blue gyms. And if you’re feeling blue you can listen to the blues.

Wishing you just the right shade of today.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

When you were but a wee tot, you loved to color. You used the big, fat crayons that come 5 to a box. Then you graduated to big-kid crayons (Auntie M gave you a set of crayons in the shape of Winnie-the-Pooh characters). Eventually you got the Big Box of Crayola (woo hoo!) and at some point you made the move to colored pencils.

Art abounded.

Every child is an artist.  The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. –Pablo Picasso

Early on you weren’t held in by conventional rules of what color should go where–which matched your ability make the lines look like something you’d actually seen. At some point your drawings became more recognizable and your color placement more closely resembled Mother Nature’s (song cue).

There is a rumor going around that spring is due to show up sometime soon. Certainly, St. Patrick’s Day is next week. And I threw out some questionable sliced turkey this morning. All of which got me thinking about the color green.

In case you weren’t aware, there is an entire body of research (and by “entire body” I mean more words than I’m going to include here) about color and what different colors mean.

Green is the color of nature. Green has great healing power and suggests stability and endurance. It is the color of renewal and rebirth.

It is the color of envy and possessiveness and prosperity and money. It is the color of mold and Oscar the Grouch.

It’s not easy being green (song cue).

Green is the color of balance and harmony, although by the end of St Patrick’s Day celebrations not everyone has balance or harmony.

Green is the color of hope, love of family, friends, pets, and home. It is generous and friendly.

It is one of the colors of more than one Important Institution of Higher Learning.

Happy Pre-St Patrick’s Day.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Next Monday is Saint Patrick’s Day. This is very important because it is a marvelous time to get serious about looking for leprechauns.

Leprechauns are pretty interesting little dudes. In addition to keeping all their gold in the End of the Rainbow bank, they spend all their time making shoes (now do you see why I like them so much? Shoes and a hefty bank account. What’s not to love?)

Leprechauns are solitary creatures and not at all fond of being captured by humans. If one should be lucky enough to capture a leprechaun, the leprechaun will grant you three wishes in exchange for being set free. One must be particularly careful about choosing those wishes, Oh Best Beloved, because leprechauns are known for being practical jokers.

You have my full permission to begin searching for leprechauns now. If you catch one, I’ll be happy to offer my advice about the three wishes.

In the meantime, you might want to practice your Irish phrases for next week so that you will not be stuck with saying “Top o’ the Mornin’ to Ya” all day long. Here are five really good ones.

May you have the hindsight to know where you’ve been, the foresight to know where you are going, and the insight to know when you have gone too far.

You’ve got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your father was.

A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures.

Forgetting a debt doesn’t mean it’s paid.

May you get all your wishes but one, so that you will always have something to strive for!

and one bonus phrase in case you encounter anyone who is prone to using the phrases “it is a fact” when (in fact) it isn’t.

Pity him who makes an opinion a certainty.

Love, Mom