Dear Kid,

There are dreams and then there are dreams.

For example, there’s the dream I had last night where one of Dad’s buddies talked Dad into painting his (Dad’s) face just before a really big really important meeting and Dad looked awful (the paint was semi-permanent) and the two of them made a colossal mess of the kitchen and the living room and I was beyond furious. Beyond beyond furious. There was green paint everywhere. I have no idea what Dad did to make my subconscious so angry but I was shaking pissed off.

Dreams are today’s answers to tomorrow’s questions.  ~Edgar Cayce

There are puppy dreams, but that’s not really what I’m talking about today.

There are the dreams we “dream” when we’re awake. Dreams of the unattainable. Like dreaming of being a huge rock star when you can’t sing a single note on key. Or of being an NBA star when you’re 5’ 2” and have the athleticism of gefilte fish.

There are the dreams we reach for, that we work toward. The dreams of inventing the next great technology. The dreams of finishing a marathon. The dreams of getting that job or fitting into that dress.

Some people would argue that some of these aren’t dreams. They are fantasies or aspirations. To them I say, “Stop arguing and go get your own blog.”

College is a great time for dreaming all kinds of dreams. It’s a great time for thinking about the “what if”. It’s a great time to set crazy high goals (because you can reach them). More importantly, it’s a great time for practicing the work ethic, the drive and determination, to reach those dreams.

Who knows? Maybe you’ll even invent a way to take the green face paint out of the carpet in my dream.

Keep dreaming, kiddo.

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Do NOT read this right before a test!!!! If a test, class, or other Important Event is coming up in the next hour, wait until later to peruse today’s DearKidLoveMom post.

I’m tired. Which started me thinking about yawning. Which started me yawning. Which of course seems sort of backward.

I consulted my good friend the internet to see if I could find out anything interesting about yawning.

While we were consulting, I discovered that while it is possible to type and yawn at the same time, it’s not always easy if you’re yawning a HUGE yawn.

A yawn so wide you can see down his neck. (Extra points if you get the reference.)

According to MFTI, no one really knows why we yawn.

One idea is that we’re bored or tired we don’t breathe as deeply as usual. Our shallower, slower breathing means we take in less oxygen. The theory is that yawning brings in more oxygen.

The only problem is that breathing oxygen doesn’t decrease yawning. The second “only problem with that theory” is that yawning doesn’t actually put more blood in our bloodstreams.

I can say with certainty that writing about yawning leads to an increase in yawning. A big increase in yawning.

Theory number two is that yawning stretches your lungs, which increases heart rate, which makes you feel more awake.

Fact: I have never felt more awake after yawning. And I’m pretty sure my lungs don’t pick bed-time as a good time to exercise (especially since none of my other organs or appendages are interested in exercise when sleep is a viable option).

Theory Number Next holds that yawning helps redistribute the surfactant that keeps lungs lubricated and prevents lungs from collapsing.

This is (imho) ridiculous. Because why would we only want to redistribute surfactant when we’re tired? And why can we sometimes go for long stretches without a yawn? Wouldn’t a lot of people have collapsed lungs?

Yet another theory holds that we yawn to cool down our brains. The theory basically says that we yawn to bring in cooler air and increasing blood flow of newly cooled blood to the brain.

AAAAnd, it turns out that when we’re bored and/or tired, our brain temperature goes up. Hot brain =more yawning. So it’s not that we yawn to get more oxygen and wake up, it’s that we yawn to cool down our brain so smarticles don’t leak out our ears. The challenge I have with this theory (which seems to be the one experts are going with at the moment) is that I rarely yawn at the gym. Perhaps it’s because they keep it nice and cool so regular breathing is sufficient to cool my grey matter. I still can’t explain why I don’t yawn when I drink hot coffee or soup.

I still have no idea why my eyes tear when I yawn a couple of times. Yawning=mascara challenges.

As I have mentioned (and as you doubtless know), yawning is even more contagious than Ebola. (Oh, hush. It’s the first Ebola reference I’ve made which I think shows great restraint on my part.)

Here’s where it gets really interesting. Yawns are not contagious in infants or children with autism. Kids begin to “catch” yawns when they’re about 4 years old.

Puppy yawns are adorable. Especially the part where they curl their tongue. How do they DO that?

Hope I’ve kept you awake. But I bet you’re yawning.

Love, Mom

P.S. Cover your mouth when you yawn.

P.P.S. The reference is to Dr. Seuss’ Sleep Book

The news just came in
from the County of Keck
That a very small bug
by the name of Van Vleck
is yawning so wide
you can look down his neck.
 
This may not seem
very important, I know.
But it IS. So I’m bothering
telling you so.
 
A yawn is quite catching, you see. Like a cough.
It just takes one yawn to start other yawns off.
NOW the news has come in that some friends of Van Vleck’s
are yawning so wide you can look down their necks.