Posts Tagged "dog"

Puppy Conversations | Writing a Get Well Card

Dear Kid,

Puppy: What are you doing?
Me: Writing a “get well” card.
Puppy: Who’s building a well?
Me: In this case, it means I hope the person feels better.
Puppy: Does someone not feel well?
Me: Yes.
Puppy: So you’re telling him to get better?
Me: Sort of.
Puppy: Because you’re a Mommy and we have to do what Mommy says.
Me: Well, I’m not HIS mommy.
Puppy: Did you tell him to take naps and drink lots of water?
Me: No, I didn’t.
Puppy: Did you tell him to eat chicken soup?
Me: Um, no.
Puppy: Did you check to see if he has a wet nose?
Me: I definitely did not do that.
Puppy: Doesn’t sound like you’re doing a very good job of telling him to get better.
Me: Sometimes we just have to send love and hope that someone gets better.
Puppy: But that can’t be right. We have to do something!
Me: What would you suggest?
Puppy: He probably needs his tummy scratched.
Me: I think I’m going to stick with sending a card.
Puppy: You need to practice helping people feel better.
Me: Can you say, “We hope you feel better soon”?
Puppy: Woof!
Me: Now it’s “woof”? You are a very strange beast.
Puppy: “Woof” might make him feel better. Especially if you won’t scratch his tummy.

Love, Mom

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Selective Hearing | Everything Old Is New Again

Dear Kid,

Having one of those “Well, duh” moments.

There’s a video making the rounds on the ‘net (you can watch it here if you really want to) that proves that dogs have selective hearing.

Well, duh.

We (and by “we” I mean all cat parents, most dog parents, and many children parents—possibly hippo parents and giraffe parents too but I can’t be sure) see this EVERY STINKIN’ DAY.

Human: Come here. Cat: As if. DearKidLoveMom.comParent: Come here
Cat blinks.

Parent: Come here
Dog continues sniffing.

Parent: Come here
Child continues building Leggos.

Parent (whispering): …treat…
Everyone races to be the first (or second) to get the treat. Except the cat who saunters nonchalantly over but has plans to kill anyone who takes the cat treat.

This is not new news.

Parent says: Clean up your room, wash your face, then we’ll go shopping for school supplies.
Child hears: Let me grab my purse, a snack for you, and the car keys and we’ll go buy Star Wars Leggos.

Again. Nothing new.

Sometimes we hear the greatest new things on the internet.

Sometimes everything old is new again (extra points if you get the reference).

Love, Mom

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Do You Know What Tomorrow Is? Take Your Dog to Work Day!

Dear Kid,

Do you know what tomorrow is? Do you KNOW?

It’s possibly the most amazing day in the history of days. Not really. But it might very well be the most amazing day this week. If we’re not including last Sunday which was Father’s Day. Because that’s a pretty amazing day.

Let’s start again.

Tomorrow is possibly the most amazing Friday of the week!

And – wait for it – it’s Take Your Dog To Work Day! How wonder-fur is that?

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Groucho DearKidLoveMom.comTYDTWD (that’s how you say it if you’re cool and in the know) started in 1996 in the UK. We adopted it on this side of the pond in 1999. And somehow, I’ve gone All This Time without knowing it existed. I have no words.

The point of TYDTWD (just for the record, that is not an easy acronym to type) is not to get your pooch to shed all over the office couch. That’s just an added benefit. The point is that pups are an important part of our lives and we should have an opportunity to let them all get together and prevent us from getting any work done.

No. The official point (as defined by the official inventors of the day, Pet Sitters International) is that dog-less co-workers will be encouraged to race out and adopt a dog when they see how wonderful the bond is between human and puppy.

Adopt a rescue dog - funny pictureI’m not sure exactly how this is supposed to work. “Oh, look at that adorable dog sniffing that other dog’s butt. Let me race out and get one.” Seems unlikely.

Or perhaps, “Sorry boss, I couldn’t get the report done because the dog ate my report. I mean ate my computer. I mean I have to go walk the dog.”

Despite my skepticism, Take Your Dog to Work Day continues to grow by leaps and bounds. Which is pretty dang cool.

Unfortunately, my Place of Employment is insufficiently enlightened, so the Puppy will stay at home and nap rather than joining me at work and napping.

Still, I’m pretty excited to know that Take Your Dog To Work Day exists. Hope you’re planning a great celebration.

Love, Mom

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Puppy Conversations | Puppy as Alarm Clock

Dear Kid,

Last night Dad and I were talking about what we wanted to do this weekend.

Dad: So we’ll get up in the morning while it’s cool and weed and plant some of the plants in containers.
Me: Wake me and I’ll kill you.

The Alarm Clock and I discuss appriopriate morning behavior. DearKidLoveMom.comDad laughed. But he didn’t argue.

This morning at 6:59 I was sleeping happily. If I recall correctly I was dreaming about clothing—really interesting spring suits, I believe.

At 7am:

Puppy: Woof! Woof woof woof!
Puppy: Woof woof woof!
Me: Mmrph.
Puppy: Woof woof woof woof woof woof ARF! ARF!ARF!ARF!
Me: Seriously?

I got up and went downstairs.

Puppy: Hi! You’re here! That’s great!
Me: What was all that about?
Puppy: What?
Me: All the barking. What was that about?
Puppy: What?
Me: You woke me up.
Puppy: What?
Puppy: Hey, you’re here. That’s great!
Me: Good morning, sweet thing.

Maybe later he’ll tell me. Right now, he’s not talking.

Me to Dad: How much did you pay him?

Dad laughed. But he didn’t argue.

Love, Mom

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Puppy Conversations | Shedding and Purple Fur

Dear Kid,

Puppy: What’s a shed?
Me: It’s a small building usually for storing things.
Puppy: Things like toys?
Me: I suppose you could store toys in a shed. Usually people put things like tools or cars there.
Puppy: Oh Good!
Me: Why?
Puppy: I’m not a shed.
Me: What do you mean?
Puppy: Daddy said I was a shed.
Daddy: I said you were shed-ding.
Puppy: There’s a bell in the shed?
Me: There’s no bell.
Puppy: Let’s go on a walk to the shed.
Me: There’s no shed.
Puppy: But Daddy said there’s a shed.
Me: Shed can also mean that your fur is falling out.
Puppy: My WHAT?! I LOVE my fur.
Me: Yes, of course you love your fur.
Puppy: Get the GLUE! I have to hold on to my fur! Call the medics!!
Me: Some shedding is normal, honey.
Puppy: But if I lose my fur, I’ll be naked!
Me: What do you think is under your fur right now?
Puppy: This is so embarrassing.
Me: When you lose fur, it makes room for new fur to grow.
Puppy: I get new fur?
Me: All the time.
Puppy: I think I’ll grow purple fur this time.
Me: That will be interesting.
Puppy: After my nap.
Me: Of course.

Love, Mom

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