Posts Tagged "college football"

Why I Love the Marching 110 (And Other Great Stuff)

Dear Kid,

Aside from the coffee we stopped for on the way to see you (one part battery acid to two parts battery acid) and my slightly sun-kissed nose, yesterday was a fabulous day.

Even the unfortunate end to the football game couldn’t take the shine off the day.

OU football! OU, Oh yeah! DearKidLoveMom.com

OU football! OU, Oh yeah! DearKidLoveMom.com

And I am now officially a HUGE RAVING fan of the Marching 110.

...the effervescence of the 110 between plays and during TV time outs is contagious...

…the effervescence of the 110 between plays and during TV time outs is contagious…

There is a convenience inherent in watching football on TV. The snacks are less expensive, there’s no line for the restroom, and did I mention the slight sunburn? But there is nothing like of being part of a cheering crowd. And the effervescence of the 110 between plays and during TV time outs is contagious (and unfortunately drowned out by TV commentators). The 110 has FUN. Halftime was EXCEPTIONAL!

Before the game and after brunch with you, Dad and I drove to  the “classic Appalachian town” of Nelsonville, OH, home of a very small historic town square, an opera house (closed for renovation), a cute emporium (bought a glass barrette), and Rocky Boots (want to kill something with four legs? Get outfitted here).

Nelsonville Brick

Nelsonville Brick

Nelsonville is famous for coal mining (which we don’t talk about) and its bricks which were often made with a star pattern and were shipped all over these here United States.

When we got back to Athens, we parked at “Event Parking $5” and walked over to the Dairy Barn and Art Gallery. I’ve seen the signs for the last two years since it isn’t that far from your apartment, but we’ve never been. Yesterday, we went.

Turns out the art gallery/museum cost $10 per human, and since we weren’t planning to enjoy $10 worth we didn’t pay. Instead I asked if I could visit the shop. Certainly, I was told. But to get to the shop you go through the gallery. I cheated and looked at the art on my way. Very cool. Not worth $10 visit fee.

The shop has much of the same art we saw in Nelsonville at the aforementioned Emporium, so we got to enjoy it a second time.

Our view during our picnic before the OU football game. DearKidLoveMom

Our view during our picnic before the OU football game. DearKidLoveMom

Then a quick picnic by the car and off to the football game.

Lovely, lovely day.

Love, Mom

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Do You Know Why Today Is Going to Be a Great Day?

Dear Kid,

Today is going to be an amazing day. Except for the Getting Up at 5:45am on the First Day of a Long Weekend Part.

Other than that, it’s going to be awesome.

Except for the driving. The early wakeup and the driving, not so great. The rest of the day, fantabulous.

Can you tell that I’m excited?

Partly because we get to see you (yay!) and feed you (whoops! Hungry college kid alert! There goes the tuition money!).

And partly because Dad and I get to spend some time together which it turns out we actually enjoy doing. Who knew?

And partly because we’re going to the Ohio University football game. Which we’ve never done before.

We’re excited to see the team play, we’re excited to see you on the sidelines, and we’re definitely excited to see the Marching 110 (about whom we have heard so much).

I looked up the Marching 110 (I think I’m required to write it in italics). I have it on great authority (and by “great authority” I mean the Marching 110’s website) that they are the Most Exciting Band in the Land! Emphasis on “exciting.” Which surprised me because I expected the emphasis on MOST. That may explain why the band has never called me for advice.

The Marching 110 currently has 245 members. The “110” refers to the original number of band members. And to the amount of effort (110%) band members are expected to put in.

The Marching 110 consists of the following instrumentation:  Clarinets, Alto Saxophones, Tenor Saxophones, Mellophones, Trumpets, Trombones, Baritones, Sousaphones, and Percussion.

No kazoos.

Ohio University's Marching 110 does not feature kazoos. DearKidLoveMom.comWait. Mellophones? What the heck is a mellophone?

I immediately turned to My Friend the Internet.

Do you know what a mellophone is?

  1. A brass instrument that says, “dude” a lot
  2. The thing you toast and then put on s’mores
  3. A silent cell phone
  4. A brass instrument similar to the orchestral French horn, played mainly in military and concert bands
  5. No, I don’t know what a mellophone is.

It is not at all obvious to me that I will know a mellophone from any other horn, but I plan to enjoy them (probably in an un-mellow way).

Today is going to be a great day.

Love, Mom

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Undisputed National Champions | Play by Play (Not Really)

Dear Kid,

Sometimes life is easy. Sometimes we have to make difficult decisions.

Last night was one of the difficult times.

Football championship or Celebrity Apprentice? NCIS reruns or football? Football or Cash Cab?

Decisions, decisions.

I choose Football. And just in case you took care of your cold and went to bed at a reasonable hour, here’s what happened.

First the commentators tried to figure out if the Ducks would eat the Buckeyes, or if Urban Meyer would pull off the win. To keep it interesting, no one agreed.

I tried to figure out if I’d stay awake through the whole game. Just to stay in the spirit of things, I didn’t agree with myself.

First, let’s talk about the obvious. The Ducks should have won the sartorial part of the competition. They have coolest font for their numbers in all football. But they were wearing white tops and silver pants which looked white and their remarkable colorlessness was disappointing. The color guard was a close second, but they marched off beat, so no. There is nothing interesting about the referee uniforms. Points to the troops shown on the giant screen at the stadium.

National Anthem: Duck mascot looked dang cute with his hand somewhere in the vicinity of his heart. Anthem well sung; everyone cheered.

Game captains walk out holding hands. So cute. Hugs and handshakes all around. Likely to be the end of gentlemanly interaction for a few hours. The ref uses a coin that has neither heads nor tails, but everyone seems happy. Eventually, the teams lined up for the kickoff.

Marcus Mariota from the Ducks (all that white is just so unfortunate given that their colors are green and yellow) won the Heisman in 2014. He’s the only Heisman winner from Hawaii. This is important because guess where your grandparents are and I’m not?

Looks like two bananas, right?Oregon pushes down to midfield. Is that a banana on the turf? False alarm, it’s a stylized football. (Booker thinks it looks like a banana too.)

According to the commentators the Buckeye defense is “stunned” by the first drive of the Ducks. But then—FUMBLE—First down Ohio State. But wait, must review upstairs. For a loooong time. And it turns out the dude was down before the ball was ripped out. Ducks keep the ball. This is important because it is the only time the Ducks will even consider turning over the ball. Not that it will help them enough (foreshadowing in case you weren’t sure).

The puppy is so amazed, he snores.

And a few snores later, the Ducks score their first touchdown. PAT snap is a little high but no one seems to care and the score is Ducks 7 Buckeyes 0.

Now it’s Ohio turn. Turns out the puppy snores equally for both teams. Bunch of plays, and the Buckeyes punt. As do the Ducks. Puppy thinks it’s snack time. Disappointment and commercials all around.

After getting pinned practically at their goal line and converting on a fourth down, the Buckeyes score. Flag on the PAT. Re-kick and now it’s 7:7. Or possibly 7:7 depending on how you look at these things.

At the commercial break, the puppy goes into the kitchen to see if anything has fallen on the floor. The urge to snack is strong with that one.

Pi and Dad come home. Much distraction, during which The Ohio State University scores again.

Second quarter. Ohio fumbles and Oregon recovers. Oregon, 4th and goal. Scrum! Whistles! Ohio holds the line. Then Ohio oopses after the play and the penalty is half the distance to the goal (measured in microns).

Rinse and repeat. Yep, Ohio fumbles and Oregon recovers.

You know, with all the things the commentators have discussed, I don’t think they’ve commented on the fact that both teams start with O. I’m pretty sure this is highly significant.

Congratulations OSU--Undesputed National Champions! DearKidLoveMom.comMore football. Ohio scores. (Sorry, got in a conversation with Dad, so I didn’t have much idea what happened until the instant replay.) Wait, not a TD. 3rd down and 3 inches to go. So they do. PAT is good.

Oregon responds by taking a long time to get to a field goal. And after a failed trick play, we go to half-time Oregon 10, Buckeyes 21.

Halftime: Much conversation. Even more commercials. Probably a halftime show, but the TV people didn’t bother us with it.

Second half.

The stylized football still looks like bananas. I am rather fixated on this. So is the puppy who would like to share the banana.

Pi: Oregon is supposed to win, right?
Me: They may not have gotten the memo
Puppy: Banana! Banana!
Dad: There are no bananas
Puppy: Please?

Ohio State is on the move. Until Oregon intercepts the ball.

Pi: That’s Jalin Marshall, right?
Dad: Yup.
Pi: Way to represent the GMC.

(Jalin played in the Greater Miami Conference in high school. So did you. Now Pi does. The sarcasm is strong in that one. Don’t feel bad, Jalin. You’ve had one heck of game.)

Oregon scores on the turnover. But the moron runner may have dropped the ball before he crossed the goal line. No, upon further review the call on the field stays.

Oregon: 17; Ohio: 21

Ohio smashes through on a crazy 4th and 1. The crowd goes crazy. Oregon responds by picking up a fumble (for the fourth time if you’re counting these things). The crowd goes crazier.

Pi: You can’t win the National Championship with 4 turnovers.

No one argues. Ohio doesn’t let the logic of this statement stop them.

Ohio prevents a TD. Ducks kick a FG. 20:21.

Finally, a commercial so I can go get a snack.

Puppy: Me too?
Me: You’re already in bed. No snack for you.
Puppy: Sad face

THE OSU says, whatev, and smashes down the field for a TD. And by “smashes” I pretty much mean “smashes” since several OSU runners left Duckie bodies strewn across the field.

The momentum goes this way. The momentum goes that way. I go look for some Dramamine.

Oregon 20: Buckeyes 35 42.

The commentators wish me to remind you that this is a very young Buckeye team. They’re all up past their bedtimes and Nannies will be taking them home after the game. Also, they should be back next year. And the year after that. And possibly until you are old and gray.

They also wish me to remind you (again) that the OSU punter is an Aussie.

Finally, they wish me to remind you how awesome OSU was in this game. You’ve been reminded.

I still can’t understand why no one thinks I should do the live TV commentary of big football games.

And so, the college football season comes to an end. Not with a vote, but with a national championship.

Who Dey!

I mean, Go Bucks!

Love, Mom

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Revisiting Clemson, OSU, and Football Violence of Yesteryear

Dear Kid,

Just in case you thought violence and misbehavior in football was a recent invention, let me assure you idiots have been around for more than a while.

Case in point: Woody Hayes, one time Ohio State University (OSU) football coach.

Hayes had been the coach of the Buckeyes for 28 years at the time of our story. On December 29, 1978, OSU was playing Clemson in the Gator Bowl. (This is very exciting, pay attention.)

Props to Clemson DearKidLoveMom.comRight near the end of the game, OSU was down two points. A Clemson Tigers linebacker intercepted a pass (can you hear the roar of the crowd?) and was knocked out of bounds on the Buckeyes sideline.

As Charlie Bauman (the Clemson linebacker in question) got up, Hayes punched him in the throat.

Under no possible interpretation of the phrase can that be considered “good sportsmanship.”

It took several Buckeyes to restrain Hayes. Under no possible interpretation of the words could Hayes have been considered “calm and reasonable.”

OSU lost 15-17.

The next day, December 30, 1978, OSU fired Hayes.

It’s worth noting (because I say so) that last night the Clemson Tigers also beat OSU in the Russell Athletic Bowl. A different OSU (last night it was Oklahoma State University) and to the best of my knowledge no players were punched in the throat.

And under no possible interpretation of the phrase can last night’s score be considered “a close game.”

Love, Mom

In case you missed it, Oklahoma finally scored when Clemson pulled their 49th string put in several cheerleaders and a trombone player. The final score was Oklahoma 6, Clemson 40.

That is not a typo.

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The Rain, The Pain, The Homecoming, Football

Dear Kid,

Last night (as I believe I’ve mentioned) was Homecoming. You know it’s homecoming because there are crowds and crowns involved. Also many people came “home.” But it’s odd to call it home when it’s a football game, and these people never really thought of High School as “home,” and the games are played at the Junior High.

It rained last night. I’d like to say it poured, it monsooned, it hurricaned. But it didn’t. It just rained. Steadily and insistently. Through the entire pre-game, game, and presumably the post-game (we did not stay for post-game). And it was chilly. Poor Tal was frozen down to her tippy-toes never having experienced the joy of a rainy football game before. Not sure how she’ll handle February.

The Homecoming Court seemed un-fazed by the rain. By “unfazed” I mean they didn’t seem unhappy. But most of them dressed for the weather rather than for the fashion generally associated with homecoming court. And the King’s crown came complete with a clear plastic bag covering it.

The football team dressed as a football team. The defense played extremely well except for letting in a more touchdowns than seemed absolutely necessary.

The offense had flashes of brilliance punctuated by long stretches of siestas and mistakes. Including a missed PAT kicked by someone who isn’t your sister.

We lost.

Sorry I didn’t send commentary on the game last night, but due to the aforementioned sogginess my phone decided to stay home. That is also the reason there isn’t a photo of the homecoming court. Or at least that’s the reason I’m using at the moment.

The JV game is today at 1pm which is a Most Inconsiderate time for a game on a day when Some People have to get fluffed and buffed for the Homecoming Dance. Fortunately, the rain has stopped (Puppy still had to have his feet wiped after his morning walk sniff but that’s a story for another day.

Enjoy your homecoming today.

Love, Mom

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