Posts Tagged "cold"

Mud, Guts, and Glory. And Cold. And a Celebrity.


Dear Kid,

Last week Pi found out about the Mud, Guts, and Glory race. She felt it was too late to train for the competition, so she invited me to volunteer with her. Being the kind of Mom I am, I said yes before I found out what volunteering involved.

That is how it came to be that at extremely early in the morning o’clock I found myself sitting alone in the woods next to a pile of tires with no pen, no paper, and only 20…19…18 percent left on my phone battery. Not one of my better planned mornings.

The tire carry at Mud, Guts, and Glory 2016. Pre-race and pre-mud.

The tire carry at Mud, Guts, and Glory 2016. Pre-race and pre-mud.

I’d been assigned to the Tire Carry obstacle. Really, Pi and I had both been assigned to the Tire Carry but they were short on volunteers and moved her to the Weaver. Did I mention that one of the reasons I agreed to volunteer was to spend time with her?

There I was, by myself. At an obstacle in the middle of Stage 5 of the race. I had about half an hour until the Elite competitors began and the first one wouldn’t get to my area for an hour and a half or so. Here’s what I was thinking.

My feet are cold. Really cold. How can nature be this cold in May?

I have to find a way to entertain myself. Commune with nature. Yep, there’s nature. Still surrounded by nature. Nature doesn’t seem to be doing anything.

What do people do in nature? Try to relax. People relax in nature, right? I’m not one of those people. People paint in nature. Think about whether you’d like to paint the trees. I’m sure someone would, but not me.

15%.  Why doesn’t nature come with electrical outlets?

The race starts in 10 minutes. They won’t reach my station for more than an hour. That’s a lot of nature to contemplate.

I try harder. I look at the trees. The poison ivy climbing up the nearest one winks at me.

13 percent. 

Dear lord.

I listen to the wind in the trees. I picture a gentle breeze on a hot day. I compare that to the reality of a sub-arctic morning with a 90 mile an hour wind.

The poison ivy smirks. It doesn’t care about the cold.

Did you know that nature doesn’t come with coffee? Who invented a coffee-less nature? Coffee’s natural. There should be a Keurig around here somewhere.

Oh, great. My phone’s dead.

Then out of nowhere, colorful racers burst around the corner, running easily and enjoying the course.

Nope, that didn’t happen. Not even a little bit. I was hoping it would, but it didn’t.

I started pacing on my little platform to warm up. I felt like the polar bear at the Central Park Zoo.

Eventually, The First Runner came sliding silently down the hill.

mgg-hillSerious competitors are focused. Really, really focused. Really, really focused on competing. No small talk here. The First Runner grabbed up two tires, slung them over his shoulders and headed around the loop. At the end, he dumped the tires and off he ran. I cheered for him. He didn’t seem to need the encouragement.

Ten minutes later, runners 2 and 3 arrived. They didn’t seem to need the cheering either.

The poison ivy didn’t bother cheering. Apparently it had already computed the outcome.

Eventually Pi showed up and made the day much more entertaining. She has that effect.

Michelle Warnky of American Ninja Warrior fame was the second woman we saw. She is a rock star. (This is my crazy impressed face.)

As the day went on the course, um, deteriorated. By that I mean where there had been mud, there was MUD. Where there had been slippery, there was treacherous. Where there had been sprinters, there were walkers pulling themselves along by their mud-covered fingernails. (Still, they did more than I did, so I’m not dissing.) Where there had been silence and concentration, there was conversation and camaraderie. It was fun.

The poison ivy continued to show its superior attitude. The Keurig didn’t show up. Neither did the feeling in our toes.

Still, it was a pretty cool day.

Love, Mom


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The Flowers That Bloom in the (Freezing Cold) Spring

Dear Kid,

Welcome to Spring.


Yesterday in Pittsburgh I wore a T-shirt, a long sleeve shirt, a wool sweater, and my down jacket. And my Serious Mittens to clear the ice and snow off the car.

Ice. And. Snow.

Which part of spring includes ice and snow?

Which part of spring includes 42 layers of clothing?

Which part of spring includes snowboots and scarves and mittens?

Of course today is going to be about 112 degrees. Which makes no sense either.

Dear Mother Nature,

A little common sense would be helpful.

Happy Spring!! DearKidLoveMom.comMeanwhile, the crocuses have bloomed, the hyacinth are flowering, the tulips are exploring moving in to a condominium, and the little purple flowers that I can’t remember the name of are singing tra-la! (except for the one that have been eaten by the rabbits).

All of which means that Spring is here (tra-la) and sunshine can’t be far behind.

Hoping you have a happy (and warmish) day.

Love, Mom

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I’m Ready for Winter Is Going

Dear Kid,

I'm ready for Winter is Going. DearKidLoveMom.comI’m done with winter.

I know it’s still February. I know winter goes through March (no matter what Phil predicts).

But regardless of what the calendar or the prognosticating Groundhog say, I’m ready to put my winter coat away. Far, far away.

Yes, yes, I know that by August I will be screaming for cool-itude, but right now my bones are cold. And I don’t have solar heated socks.

Some people are never happy with extreme weather....

Love, Mom

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What’s the Worst Compliment You’ve Ever Gotten?

Dear Kid,

You look marvelous!

You’re so nice!

What a great pair of shoes.

In case you didn’t know, it’s Compliment Day.

Which is a good excuse for you to call your mother and say something nice. Like, “You are the best mom I’ve ever had!” or “I love reading your blog, mom!” or something else kind that involves an exclamation point.

Exclamation points are an important but not mandatory part of Compliment Day. For example, you could say, “Great job!” or you could say, “Nicely done.” Either will make the person you’re talking to feel good; which you choose depends on who you aim the compliment toward.

If you’re talking to a dog, always go for the exclamation point; if you’re talking to a cat, don’t bother.

I conducted a formal scientific survey to see what the best and worst compliments are. (Just to be clear, by “formal scientific survey” I mean “not scientific at all”.) The best compliments are the ones that are sincere; the worst ones are the sarcastic ones.

You probably do a good job of being kind to people and giving compliments on a regular basis. Today is just a reminder to continue.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever gotten?

Love, Mom


You are the best son ever!

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Winter is Here | White Stuff Causes Panic

Dear Kid,

Winter is Coming Here.

We didn't get much snow in Cincinnati this time, but other places did. To everyone who got more snow than we did, stay warm and stay safe. DearKidLoveMom.comThere was a lot of snowcraze in the forecast, and our office closed at 3pm yesterday so that people could get home before things got really bad.

That worked in that there was very little snow when we left. However, according to the traffic reports, people were driving like idiots trying to get away from the Snow That Wasn’t (or possibly the Snow That Was to Be) because there were accidents all over town.

According to the Dad Forecast, there wasn’t going to be enough snow to get concerned about so we let Pi sleep over at a friend’s house last night.

Which meant that I had to jump out of bed this morning and assess whether it would be safe for her to drive home. (It is.)

According to the Driveway Report (an index of how much snow is on our driveway and therefore might or might not get shoveled), there wasn’t really any snow. Danger of pulled muscles due to shoveling: zero.

According to the Puppy Report, it is dang cold and it would be much nicer if he could figure out how to go for a walk without actually having to touch the ground. But at least there isn’t any ice.

According to the News People, there might still be snow in the area (although it doesn’t sound like they really mean it).

I think what happened was that the Advance Scout Snowflakes landed here and reported that we were already freaking out about the storm and that the snow would have more fun going other places to wreak havoc.

Which it did, because according to Auntie M in Maryland, it is hard to open the door to let the puppy out. Fortunately, that puppy has much longer legs than our puppy and is unlikely to get lost in the snow.

Also, according to Auntie M, the best term going for this storm is SnOMG.

To everyone experiencing weather, stay warm and stay safe.

Love, Mom

Since everyone is stuck inside, remind them to read DearKidLoveMom. It’s very warming.

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