Posts Tagged "chocolate"

It’s Chocolate Day!

Dear Kid,

Yippee!! It’s Chocolate Day!

As if we needed an excuse, but IT’S CHOCOLATE DAY!

And we don’t really need to be creative, but it’s Chocolate Day so why not?

World's Best Street. DearKidLoveMom.comChocolate milk and chocolate cereal with a chocolate éclair for breakfast.

Triple chocolate brownies for a mid-morning snack.

Chocolate fondue and chocolate chip cookies for lunch.

Chocolate covered strawberries, chocolate soda, and chocolate covered pretzels for snack.

Chocolate peanut butter pie, chocolate covered bacon, and a chocolate milkshake for dinner.

Chocolate mousse cake and hot chocolate for bedtime snack.

And s’mores if you wake up in the middle of the night, because why not?

See how easy this is?

And, YUM!

Happy Chocolate Day, my sweetie. (I have to go snarf some chocolate.)

Love, Mom

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What a Difference a Year Makes & First World Problems

Dear Kid,

What a difference a year makes.

Last year (as you may recall) I went to Las Vegas for a conference and got stuck due to charmingly lovely weather. Read about it here and here and here and here if you’ve forgotten all the hysterical details.

This year I went to the same conference (version 2016) in Orlando and travel was uneventful. Which (imho) is exactly how it should be. Thank you Mickey for the excellent weather across the nation.

Meanwhile, the crazy weather has the spring flowers thoroughly confused. DearKidLoveMom.com

The flowers that bloom in the spring Tra La!

Meanwhile, crazy weather here in southwest Ohio. One minute it’s warmish, the next minute it’s coldish. One minute people are singing “the cold never bothered me anyway,” and the next they’re searching for shorts and a T-shirt. One minute the frozen vortex of winter is freezing peoples’ vocal chords (causing weird versions of “Let It Go” to leak out of scarf-wrapped heads), and the next minute tulips are waking up.

The hotel we stayed in in Florida was very nice except for their soft drink policy. It is a Pepsi hotel.

You know I believe that Diet Coke is one of the most important food groups on the planet (right up there with the Chocolate food group and the Coffee food group). This hotel had not gotten the memo. They served diet Pepsi. (Fortunately, the bartender was kind enough to squeeze about a hundred limes into mine so I could drink it.) They were savvy enough to offer coffee and Diet Dr. Pepper so the world did not have to come to a crashing halt.

On the other hand, if this is the worst challenge I face this month, I’ve got a pretty good life.

Stay warm. Or cool. Or whatever the weather by you dictates I should be saying at this exact moment.

Love, Mom

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Happy National Chocolate Day!

Dear Kid,

It’s NATIONAL CHOCOLATE DAY!!!!

And yes, National Chocolate Day is worth caps and all those exclamation points.

 

World's Best Street. DearKidLoveMom.com

As we have previously discussed, chocolate is (without a doubt) one of the most important major food groups. Especially if it is dark chocolate. And in front of me. And I don’t have to arm wrestle anyone for it.

Chocolate (as I might have mentioned once or twice) is good for you. Pure cocoa actually helps prevent tooth decay. Turns out that some of the chemicals in cocoa fight mouth bacteria—sort of an oral light saber battle. One wonders why there isn’t chocolate toothpaste… (Looking at you, Colgate and Crest.)

There’s been a lot of research on chocolate (I conduct research every day, testing to see if it will eliminate the need to color my hair). While research has not (yet) proven that chocolate can compete with Clairol, researchers (not me) have shown that chocolate helps skin! German scientists have shown that flavonoids in chocolate “absorb UV light, which helps protect and increase blood flow to the skin, ultimately improving its appearance.” Hershey’s can add a whole new product line of acne-fighting candy.

One chocolate chip can give a person enough energy to walk 150 feet.

According to some Eeyore-ish scientists who probably haven’t had their daily chocolate fix, it is possible to die if you eat too much chocolate. Well duh. Turns out that if you power snarf 22 pounds of chocolate, you’ll ingest enough theobromine to end up on a slab. Stick with a daily ration of 21 pounds and you won’t die. But by the time you do kick off they’ll need an extra-reinforced table. Maybe a little less is sufficient.

Dark chocolate is especially beneficial. Dark chocolate boosts memory, attention span, ability to tolerate boring meetings, reaction time, problem-solving skills, vision, blood pressure, shopping endurance, mood, platelet function, and ability to write blogs.

I’d tell you more, but I need to go stock up on my daily allotment.

Love, Mom

 

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21 Things You Should Never Stay in the Hospital Long Enough to Do

Dear Kid,

I hope you don’t ever have a long hospital stay. But if you do have to spend any amount of time in the hospital, please understand that it is important to leave before you get too used to being there.

21 Things You Should Never Stay in the Hospital Long Enough to Do. DearKidLoveMom.comHere are 21 things you should never stay in the hospital long enough to do.

  1. Learn to like hospital food.
  2. Celebrate more than one major holiday.
  3. Write the Great American Novel.
  4. Read and comment on all of Shakespeare’s plays. Including the obscure ones.
  5. Learn the names of the nurses who fill in when the regular nurses are on vacation.
  6. Become proficient in Jell-O stacking.
  7. Knit a sweater. For Hagrid.
  8. Knit an afghan for one of the nurse’s babies.
  9. Memorize the hospital meal rotation.
  10. Be invited to a doctor’s retirement party.
  11. Earn a hospital designation like “The Patient We’ve Kept the Longest.”
  12. Be written up in the American Medical Association Journal as “an interesting case.”
  13. Become proficient with an arc welder (yeah, that idea is still cracking me up).
  14. Learn how to drink hot coffee through a straw.
  15. Figure out how to smuggle in good coffee and chocolate.
  16. Launch a line of makeup suited for hospital lighting.
  17. Earn “frequent patient” platinum status.
  18. Be invited to join a hospital committee as the patient representative.
  19. Outgrow your pedicure.
  20. Outgrow your hospital gown.
  21. Turn into “that patient I was telling you about.”

Love, Mom

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Apple Pie and Coffee. And Yum.

Dear Kid,

Once upon a time, there was no such thing as apple pie. That was because no one had ever eaten an apple. Then Eve took a bite and said, “Well, now I know what to do with all that pastry.” See? It really was the tree of knowledge.

Ever since then, people have been baking apple pies of various and sundry varieties.

Mrs. Joe Neanderthal was not a huge fan of pies. When one of her children started whining for an apple pie, she put an apple on his head, smashed it down, and said, “Pie-shmy.” Incidentally, that was how apple sauce was invented.

Other people love apple pie, no matter what shape it’s in. Round pie, square pie, McDonald’s (a pie shape unto itself), apple pie is as American as, well, apple pie.

In a highly scientific survey, I have determined that the most popular apple pie (according to Most Americans) is the one in front of them. Followed closely by the one behind them.

The only thing the different kinds of apple pie have in common is “apples.” Other than that, they are as different as can be.

Some apple pies have two crusts. Some have one. Some have one and a half (a lattice). Some don’t really have a crust at all, more of a crumble top (I like those best). Some have cinnamon (we don’t speak of the ones that don’t). Some have raisins (YUM!). Some are fried. Some are made right in the apple (which seems like cheating to me).

Some have bourbon (Yum!), some have caramel (Yum!). Some are deep dish, some are more tart-like, some are in a traditional pie plate.

Some are served with whipped cream, some are served with ice cream, some are served with cheddar cheese, some are served with coffee (yay!).

According to my research, there are only two possible problems with apple pie. 1. It almost never has chocolate in it. 2. It might not be served.

All in all, apple pie is a pretty good way to eat your fruit.

Love, Mom

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