Dear Kid,

You might not have been paying attention, but there was a lot of Are You Kidding Me? TV this weekend.

Not just in football, although there was good deal of that. And not just the live production (rebroadcast) of The Wiz, although there was that. And not just the Democratic debate, although that too (apparently) qualified.

No Dearest. The Are You Kidding Me? TV event I refer to is the Miss Universe pageant. If you haven’t heard about this crown-tastrophe you have been under a rock not checking social media, because this was Are You Kidding Me? TV to the nth degree. And then some.

Turns out people (especially those who aren’t American) take Miss Universe VERY seriously. And it did not go well.

Let me set the scene.

Pretty women. Beautiful women. Tall, lanky, stunning women. The most gorgeous human creatures in The Universe. The M.C. was Steve Harvey; not my fave, but no one asked me. A big stage. Small outfits. Lots of pulchritude (look it up).

Scene set.

Swimsuits were modeled. Confidence was strutted. Questions were asked and answered. And the winner was announced: Miss Colombia! Tears, flowers, crown.

Except Not So Much.

Because Miss Colombia was actually the Runner Up. Miss Philippines actually won. But Steve Harvey (still not my fave) announced the Wrong Person.

Yep.

Steve Harvey had to come back on stage and explain that he’d oopsed. Miss Colombia (who doesn’t speak English and had no idea what was going on) was de-crowned, Miss P was rightfully proclaimed the New Miss Universe, and absolutely no one on the planet (except her mother) paid the least bit of attention since everyone was focused on Miss C (Oh, Poor You) and Mr. H (One job, dude. You had One Job).

Steve Harvey apologized. A lot. The Twitterverse was not kind. At all. Especially when Steve misspelled his Twitter apology. “Columbia” is the school and no one knows what “Philippians” is.

Are You Kidding Me?

Love, Mom

Dear Kid,

Mea Culpa.

I got it wrong.

A few days ago I commented on major league baseball (MLB if you prefer). More specifically, I talked about attending my first professional baseball game and my observations thereof. Much of what I said was accurate, or at least sufficiently opinion-based to be inarguable. But I oopsed.

I said Cinci would host this year’s All Star Game.

As several people have gently pointed out, Cincinnati is hosting Next Year’s All Star Game. July 14, 2015 should you care to mark your calendar.

I thought about bluffing and blustering my way along by explaining that people need to not only read between the lines, but also read between the words. Here was the logic I was considering.

What I actually said:

This year’s All-Star Game will be in Cincinnati. 

The odd logic I was considering using:

What I was implying was: This (the year of which I speak, 2015) year’s All-Star Game will be in Cincinnati. 

I decided that was pushing it, even for me.

I also firmly believe that it is important to admit when we’re wrong. It is especially important for people other than me to admit when they’re wrong.

Admitting that we’re (occasionally) wrong keeps us from looking like stuck up idiots because we’re all occasionally incorrect.

Sitcoms regularly recycle the idea of a character being unable to utter the phrase “I was wrong.” Sometimes they are able to make it funny. More often it’s just sad.

Being wrong is part of being human. Recognizing it, admitting it, and apologizing and correcting the mistake is part of being an adult.

To quote the vernacular, “Man up.”

Love, Mom