Dear Kid,

Fitbit: Get up.
Me: Shhh.
Fitbit: Get up.
Me: It’s Sunday.
Fitbit: That it is. Get up.
Me: You’re supposed to let me sleep on Sundays.
Fitbit: I did. Now it’s time to get up.
Me: I don’t remember setting an alarm for today.
Fitbit: Get up.

 

Fitbit: Get moving.
Me: It’s Sunday.
Fitbit: So you said. Get moving.
Me: And the Bengals are playing.
Fitbit: How nice.
Me: In London!
Fitbit: At least they’re moving.

 

Fitbit: Get moving!
Me: Drinking coffee. Doesn’t that count?
Fitbit: Nope.
Me: And I ate a banana. Doesn’t that count for something?
Fitbit: Sure. It counts for sharing a banana with the Puppy. Doesn’t count for exercise.
Me: I’m cheering for the Bengals. That has to count.
Fitbit: Did you walk to the stadium?
Me: To London?
Fitbit: Right. You walked from the kitchen to the couch. Doesn’t count for a whole lot.
Me: Sigh. I’ll get another cup of coffee.
Fitbit: You might want to go the long way.

 

Fitbit: Excuse me…
Me: I’m writing.
Fitbit: Yeah, I know.
Me: You’re interrupting.
Fitbit: Just want to be clear about something.
Me: OK. What?
Fitbit: You know that typing doesn’t count as exercise, right?
Me: Fingers are getting a lot of work.
Fitbit: Still doesn’t count.
Me: Bengals scored a touchdown!!!
Fitbit: It’s going to take a while to get you moving, isn’t it?
Me: Who Dey!!

Love, Mom