Dear Kid,

Stop! That hurts! DearKidLoveMom.comIt’s going to be one of those days.

There is the standard stuff of the day. Rush hour traffic, crazy clients, telemarketers—all the stuff that makes life so enjoyable.

And then there’s Physical Therapy.

The place where they do as much as possible to inflict pain in the name of eliminating pain.

So it’s a place I always look forward to going.

Today it’s going to be even better than usual because in addition to KT Tape – yes, you guessed it – we’re doing dry needling again.

Dry needling is a technique that’s supposed to help your muscles relax.

I looked it up. The first article explained that dry needling is derived from acupuncture. The second article insisted that dry needling is in no way, shape, or form related to acupuncture. I gave up researching.

The way dry needling works is the therapist finds the tightest, most painful part of the muscle and jabs it with a fine filament needle (aka acupuncture needle). The muscle objects. The therapist wiggles the needle around and jabs it into the muscle a few times. The muscle objects more. The theory is that the muscle will twitch (contract) and then release (relax).

Did I mention the muscle objects?

It’s nothing compared to how the nerves react.

Nerve 1: Hey, someone is digging their thumbs in here
Nerve 2: Yeah, I noticed that too
Nerve 1: Well, at least they’re being reasonably gentle
Nerve 2: Yeah, I thought so too—WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS GOING ON!!!

Then the nerves start screaming, yelling, trying to dodge the needle, and generally causing a ruckus.

Do you know how many nerves there are in the human body? And did you know that one acupuncture needle can hit 90% of them at once? And did you know that they don’t like being poked?

They make it pretty clear.

Me: Ow. Ow. OW!!
Phil-The-Owner: Should we assume it hurts?
Physical Therapist: She did accuse us of being sadists
Me: OW!
Physical Therapist: And it’s working
Me: Fine. But OW!

Such joy.

Love, Mom