Dear Kid,

In case you haven’t been paying attention, I have poison ivy. On my face.

Dear Mom,

My poison ivy is getting much better. No need to worry. Really.

Love, Me

It is not the Most Fun Thing I’ve Ever Done. Thank heavens for prednisone. To be fair, it’s not the worst, but it definitely ranks among Things I’d Prefer Not To Do Again.

In case you were contemplating something involving our three-leaf friend, I’ve put together a list of 10 reasons to change your mind. I’m just that kind of a mom.

10 Reasons Not to Play with Poison Ivy

  1. It itches. A lot.
  2. Poison ivy bumps and blisters are not attractive. To anyone.
  3. Batman will come after you.
  4. Urushiol, which is the oil in poison ivy that causes all those lovely bumps and blisters, is extremely stable and can stay active for years. Many years.
  5. Airborne poison ivy is extremely dangerous (it doesn’t exactly fly, but can go through the air with the greatest of ease with a little help from a lawn mower, weed wacker, or just from falling vines).
  6. 50% of the urushiol that hits your skin will be absorbed in 10 minutes.
  7. Once urushiol is absorbed into your skin, you can wash all you like but it won’t help at all.
  8. Some people don’t have a reaction to poison ivy; you’re probably not one of them.
  9. People who know how to do it correctly can harvest the sap from poison ivy and turn it into a beautiful lacquer finishing agent. You’re not one of those people either.
  10. It itches. A lot. A whole lot.

Love, Mom

Just in case you missed the beginning…

Poison Ivy (Part I) | More Than a Batman Character

Poison Ivy (Part II) Take Your Face to Work Day