Dear Kid,

Yesterday, while taking the Puppy for his morning walk, I discovered that my right rainboot leaks.

Pinkie toe: Um, damp over here.
Me: Quiet. It’s too early for talking toes.
Pinkie toe: Taking on water over here.
The rest of my toes sniggered. No one is nice that early in the morning.
Puppy: I’m nice
Me: True
Middle toe: Ugh, it’s wet in here.
Pointer toe: Start bailing! Ship to shore: SOT!
Me: What?
Pointer toe: Save Our Toes!
Me: Oh, goodness.
Puppy: I have to sniff.
Pinkie toe: Puddle astern!!
Big toe: Man the lifeboats! Scuttle the sock drawer!
Pointer toe: Bail! Bail!
Me: I can’t believe this.
Puppy: I can’t believe you’re not sniffing.
Middle toe: Is it bath time?
Pointer toe: Every toe to their stations!
Fourth toe: Haven’t you noticed that we’re connected?
Pointer toe: Don your SCUBA gear!
Big toe: Did someone actually plan for me to get wet?
Pinkie toe: I thought the point of boots was for us to stay dry?
Fourth toe: You can’t believe every pair of shoes you talk to.
Pointer toe: Heave to! Lower the aft sails! Look lively!
Big toe: There ought to be some sort of celebration before we drown.
Me: There will not be any drowning today.
Middle toe: We could sing.
Me: There will not be any singing before I’ve had coffee.
Fourth toe: I hope there are dry towels at home.
Pointer toe: Raise the jib! Land ho! Keep bailing!
Me: I liked it better when you guys were dry and quiet.
Toes (in unison): So did we!
Puppy: Hey, it’s raining! I’m wet!
Pinkie toe: No one ever listens until it’s too late.
Puppy: Heading for home and dryness!
Toes: Glub. Glub.
Me: The day can only get better, right?

Love, Mom

P.S. Thanks for the title Pi!