Dear Kid,
Over the years, you’ve had lots of new (temporary) homes–and we’ve been there to help you settle in to all of them.
We took you to see your new classroom and meet your teacher (and ride the school bus around the parking lot) before Kindergarten. We drove you to camp and helped you make your bed and meet your counselors. We went with you to find your myriad of classrooms when you started junior high.
When it was time for college we helped you move into your dorm rooms for the first few years and then into your apartment.
We weren’t there for every minute of every day, but at least we could help you get settled in (and make sure you were living someplace relatively clean [even if it wouldn’t always stay that way] and safe).
Now you are headed off to an internship and we aren’t taking you. You’re driving yourself, you’re moving yourself in, and we’re completely left out of the process.
Many moons ago (when you were a toddler-type person), my friend Nancy pointed out that we (Americans) raise our children to be independent (not so in all cultures, but it’s what we do).
The good news is that we’ve done (imho) a fantastic job of raising you to be independent.
The bad news is that somewhere along the way, we forgot to teach ourselves that we’d survive letting you go off on your own.
You’re driving yourself to your internship city.
And I don’t think I’m ready.
I want to be there with you. I want to see where you’re living, meet the roommates, inspect the neighbors, purchase some groceries. I want to explore the new city with you (or at least the route you’ll drive to your internship), meet the people you’ll work with, reassure myself that you can find the grocery store and that your landlord isn’t an obvious ax-murderer.
But I don’t get to do that this time.
We’ll come visit you and I hope you’ll show us around, but that’s not the same as moving you in.
And I’m not ready.
How can I be when you just started Kindergarten last week?
It really is something – to think of him moving in without you. Did the internship program help him find the apartment? Will he live with other students?
I am excited for him, and I feel for you.
Hoping he has a wonderful experience, and also that the next place he moves will be closer to home.